I guess you in a way are lucky that you were able to say goodby I never got that chance, so there are so many things I still want to to have said to Dan. I know he taught me to be a strong person so I try to do what he would want me to do when things go wrong, so I guess in a way he is still here helping me along the way, but it sure would be nice to see that smile of his when I get something done right, cause I know he would be proud of me,like when I went on my owen to trade cars I am sure he got a laugh or two that day!
thank you Mary jane I do understand I think the site will heilp me now but I can see that a person could get stuck in one place. I do so much better when I am out of the house and around other people. I also had to learn to use the riding lawn mower what a trip that was I kept the women that work laughing with my storys every week about all the crazy things that happened when I mowed. I have pictures of my husband by my bed and that is the last thing I do at night is to tell him I love him and say goodnight. I wear a braclet with a heart charm that says "always" and I had placed the same charm in my husbands hand when he was buried, because that is how I always signed my cards or letters to him, he will always be the only one for me.
I am so tired of being the the only one to make all the decisions, when some days are just a blurr. I hate feeling so alone ,when something goes wrong around the house,I guess I just get tired of being tired of all of this., and I know my life as I knew it will never return.
I have suffered from panic attacks, so this has really been hard for me too!! I do have days when I laugh, but I guess late at night things seems so alone. My son lives 2 hours away but he has been so great at reaching out and talking to me alot,Dan was his stepdad but they always got along really well together,so this has been hard on him too. sometimes I wish I would wake up and this would all have just been a bad dream.
mary thanks for the encouragement, I hate the anniversary part too but christmas eve it will be 6 months that Dan will be gone. I have my kids and my Grandkids that are wonderful and a new grandson due in March, so much to be thankful for,but the daily heartache of missing the love of my life is hard to bare
Mary Jane, I feel the same way. I lost my wife September 8, 2009 and it seem like nothing else matters any more. She was everything to me. How can I go on with out her. I miss her so much. My heart is broken.
a wine festival sounds perfect, you should go for it missy, it could be like an anniversary time for yourself since you and lou had the wine of the month gift its like a sign..you should go and have fun, you deserve it
yes as a matter of fact i have, i painted michaels bedroom right after he came here to live when he was 5 and i must say i was a little nervous too but i did a good job and it didn't take me long at all. Actually i kinda liked it. My floors are wood too and not in such great shape.
Well I don't drive so when Carl got sick we talked quite a bit about cremation and decided that was what to do then he could be here with me always, and I am glad as well cause I too can chat with him whenever and I would never get to go to a cemetary and I don't think I could handle not being near him. Walmart, good for you lol. That is a good idea about changing one of your rooms just for you, why not....
oh that is not weird next time you get you hair done tell her that you have a friend who sleeps with her husbands remains and see what she thinks lol, it makes me feel good sometimes to put him in the bed with me, I put a pillow over the box and hug it all night, is that weird?
no my dear you are not in this thing alone, we are together going through the good and bad and i am ever greatful to have you even though you are far away i know i can count on you to listen to my words as you can count on me for the same
Well i just can't believe it, I went to bed last night I was so tired and All I could see was carl as he was dying and I was up and down for a long time, isn't that odd. I do try to find the good in people and things, guess I have always been like that,my mom was as well. I don't know just to think that a part of carl was living on in someone else seems kinda cool
30 minutes that would be upsetting but that is how those doner things work, they have to have the organ as soon as possiable. Carl wasn't a doner but i wish he had been, espescially the eyes and then i could look at whoever had his eyes and feel as if in a way his life was carrying on through someone else..
oh i am so so sorry to hear that mary jane. This disease just hits everywhere, it really makes me mad. I have been trying for over an hour to get on this site, i dont know if it is this computer or what but if i don't get back to you right away you will know why Tell your daughter she is in my prayers..
yes i did and thank you they are really pretty, who knew you could make those, not me. I think i like the multicolored one the best but the pink flowers are pretty too, oh they are all so nice, good work