Cathy Pearly's Comments

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At 6:41pm on April 3, 2011, Susan - Donny's Mom said…

Thank you for your post on the main page.  I get so sad when I see someone posting those "threatening" posts.  I look to this site for strength and comfort and it is so hard to read those posts of someone in such despare.  You have suffered a double loss and have every reason to give up, but I admire your inner strength to hang in there and give great advice.....I love reading your posts.

Our trip to Palm Desert in May had to be canceled as the Dr. would not let my husband travel that far after back surgery.  We will be coming down in the Fall now.

Again, I really admire your posts and your advice to all.

Hugs.

Susan

At 6:41pm on April 3, 2011, Susan - Donny's Mom said…

Thank you for your post on the main page.  I get so sad when I see someone posting those "threatening" posts.  I look to this site for strength and comfort and it is so hard to read those posts of someone in such despare.  You have suffered a double loss and have every reason to give up, but I admire your inner strength to hang in there and give great advice.....I love reading your posts.

Our trip to Palm Desert in May had to be canceled as the Dr. would not let my husband travel that far after back surgery.  We will be coming down in the Fall now.

Again, I really admire your posts and your advice to all.

Hugs.

Susan

At 12:57am on March 29, 2011, Jackie Jones said…
i cant imagine having loose my husband after this either.  you seem like such a strong person to endure all this.  i am worried about my husband as he is an alcholic and been told his liver enzymes are too high and should quit or else its going to kill him.  which i worry about as he wont quit.  its just a matter of time before it kills him.  when you have cirhosis of the liver starting its just a matter of when.  it sucks.
At 12:53am on March 29, 2011, Jackie Jones said…
thank you for your post.  sometimes i feel so alone as having lost my only son and having no chance for grandkids of my own.  my husband has two other sons he didnt get to raise them but has a relationship with them for about a year now.  they are both in their twentys and have children.  i call them my grandchildren but since my son died it seems to different now.  as they really are not my birth grandchildren.  we were supposed to watch his grandkids for a week in may but i told him i didnt think i could do it right now that it would be to painful for that long of a period of time.  i know im not alone in loosing a child but i feel alone in having lost my only child and having to find a new purpose in life.  my grief so on a roller coaster right now.  i try to keep it together too much and then it comes out in this manic crazy grief.  i wish we all could get together some time i wish we all didnt live so far apart.  you are closer than most on here.  oregon seems to be not on the map here.  but we are close in our hearts. 
At 9:40am on March 11, 2011, valerie moore said…
cathy, hope your day today is filled with peace and happy memories of your beautiful son, jake.  my heart is with you day and always.  love you,  valerie
At 7:54pm on March 10, 2011, Susan - Donny's Mom said…

Dear Cathy....you will in my thoughts tomorrow for Jake's Angel Birthday.  Hope you find some peace in the memories you have with him.

Sending you hugs

Susan   Donny's Mom

At 11:07am on March 10, 2011, shannon churchill said…
I will be thinking of you tomorrow Cathy...  God bless you.   I don't think I have the strength to go to the sight where they found Tommy.   I don't even want to drive by it..   I know that I will one day.   It is just too soon.   He was in a ditch on Christmas Day this year.   Hypothermia was the cause.   We are planning a balloon release on Tommy's birthday in October... it would have been his 24th.   
At 1:16pm on March 9, 2011, valerie moore said…
HI CATHY- I WROTE YOUR NUMBER DOWN..SO I HAVE IT.. ANYWAY, PRAYERS CAN DO MIRACLES. I AM PRAYING THAT FRIDAY WILL BE PEACEFUL AND FULL OF HAPPY MEMORIES OF YOUR BEAUTIFUL SON, JAKE.  ALL MY LOVE,  VALERIE.   CAN YOU POST ME YOUR ADDRESS?
At 12:25pm on March 9, 2011, valerie moore said…
dearest friend cathy,  i lost your phone number.  i am thinking of you as friday approaches. anniv are so difficult.  i am praying for you.  please either call me and leave me your number or write to me with your phone number.  love you .... your forever friend,   valerie
At 10:36pm on March 7, 2011, JOYCE MASHER, 4 Amy 5158791808 said…

Hi Cathy, I was going back and forth on older posts and noticed your sons Angel date is coming up. I just want to say we will have him and you and yours in our thoughts on that day. We are into about 2 and a half years and it just seems like yesterday as we all say. Know that we send our love.

 

 

At 3:00pm on March 2, 2011, Janet - Todd's Mom said…

Hi Cathy,

Thank you so much for your comments to me.  You're right, all the would haves and should haves won't bring my son back, but I feel as though I have to at least file a complaint with the Board of Medicine, which I've done.  At the very least, a letter should be put in her file.

How is your dog Sarah Girl doing?  It's so hard to our pets get older and sick.  I've been through it with 3 cats over the years (Todd loved cats so much).  Now we have a Siberian Husky who desperately needed a new home because the owners couldn't take her escape artist antics any more and were close to bringing her to a shelter.  My husband & I had taken care of her in the past, many times when they went on vacation.  We'd also get her out for walks in the woods, where she could run off-leash and burn off some energy.  So, of course, we already loved her and couldn't stand the thought of her going to a shelter.  She'll be 9 next month.  Todd loved her too because she's so quiet and loves attention.  I'm glad you have the dogs...I've found them to be one of the few things that can make me feel better.  (I walk dogs in the woods most days and love all of them as if they were my own).

Thanks for the hugs and smiles; now I'm sending them to you!   Janet

At 5:36pm on February 28, 2011, Jackie Jones said…
thank you for posting the grief letter i think that will be very beneficial for our long horrible process we must go through
At 5:03am on February 28, 2011, valerie moore said…
cathy- quick note before work. a melanoma is a cancerous mole.  i have had one back in 1981. thankfully only the mole itself was cancer, however they took alot of tissue off my back to check it all out.  thank you for your dear post .. i will try to be strong today.  i believe that dusty would want me to.  love you,  valerie
At 6:28pm on February 27, 2011, valerie moore said…
cathy,we will always be moms/  period!  because our sons transitioned into their new life, we are still their moms. that , i my own opinion will forever be our identity.  tomorrow is the 1 1/2 yr anniv./  cathy, i feel real down.  i cannot believe i havent seen nor heard from dusty.for that long.  we spoke every day, saw each other several time a week.  i wonder just how i have stayed alive this long. i still wonder about the future. you are always in my thoughts and prayers.  love, valerie
At 6:28pm on February 27, 2011, valerie moore said…
cathy,we will always be moms/  period!  because our sons transitioned into their new life, we are still their moms. that , i my own opinion will forever be our identity.  tomorrow is the 1 1/2 yr anniv./  cathy, i feel real down.  i cannot believe i havent seen nor heard from dusty.for that long.  we spoke every day, saw each other several time a week.  i wonder just how i have stayed alive this long. i still wonder about the future. you are always in my thoughts and prayers.  love, valerie
At 8:18am on February 26, 2011, Janet - Todd's Mom said…
Of course you are still a mother, still a parent.  Just as I am a mother of two, even though my son is not here on earth with us any more.  We lost our son from complications of pneumonia and acute respiratory distress syndrome, which I still don't understand because he had always been healthy.  Still finding it hard to believe and missing him so much.  It's like having a knife in my heart.  But, when people ask me how many children I have, I say "two", but I lost my son on June 8, 2009.  And I well understand your love for your son's dogs.  When the pain of Todd not being here was more than I could bear, my dog still needed love, a walk, food & water and love.  I know people who have never had children. Their love for their dogs is so overwhelming that I worry about them when the time comes for their dogs to leave this earth.  No, it won't be like the pain we feel having lost a child, but, they've never had the experience of raising a child.  Only raising their dog.  This world is just too painful.  Love & hugs to you.  Janet
At 5:35am on February 26, 2011, Karen Kloo said…
Thank you for your response, I have not read the final police report and yes the intial one was shocking, I am lucky though that I had an angel with him, the man who tried to save him.  He let me know at least my son passed away  before the car exploded. and yes I have awful visions  of him burning alive and to know he was gone helps me so much.   
At 3:45pm on February 16, 2011, valerie moore said…

dear cathy, just thought i would let you know,  i am praying for you due to the upcoming 4 anniv for jacob. i know that every anniv is hard, years dont matter... i understand that day will be difficult.  i plan to call you that day to see how you are doing-what time would be a good time to call.

love you,  valerie

At 12:18pm on February 15, 2011, Rev.James Durden said…
HI Cathy,Happy belated Valentines Day,I know this time cn be very hard but try and look at it as a time of two of your greatest loves looking at you and smiling with all of the love you can grasp at one time knowing that they love you so much.27 yrs.of grateful love and 27 yrs that someone else didn't have for they have longed to have a love that long and God allowed you to share that great a love for so long and now you look back and look up as your two loves still hold the best place in your heart.Be Blessed Cathy and be thankful for so much love for that's how I look at it and thank God because many have not had the time we have had with our love ones.My Kisha has been gone 5yrs come april 10th and I cry as if it were yesterday. 
At 11:25am on February 10, 2011, valerie moore said…

hi cathy,  i was so glad to hear about your dear sarah.  i have prayed for her.  i have a rhodesion ridgeback that is 12 1/2 yrs old, doing good and pretty healthy, except i can see her really slowing down, just sleeping alot. it feel as though i simply cannot lose her.  i just couldnt handle it anytime soon.  i also have a 1/ 1/2 yr old white lab , female.  oh ,, she is such a puppy, wild and crazy..but she is beautiful and we love her... she was given to me by my  mom 3 days after i lost dusty, so i am just now being able to bond with her.

anyway, i went through a box of dustys things just after he passed, the box is beside my bedside, i cannot bear to go through them now.  time of of no essence. we just survive day to day... some days are unbearable. some are barely ok.  we miss our beautiful sons like a pain only a mother has lost a child could relate.  in a million years, we never would have imagined we would have to be on this journey.  journey of pure hell. cathy, i am blessed to have you as a friend.  i pray you are doing as well as possible.  love, your friend, valerie

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