Ths will be the first christmas since my son past. Lawrence passed on October 9, 2010 he was thirteen. My husband doesnt understand why I dont want to do christmas shoppin. He says we have four other younger kids and we need to do it for them but it is so hard. I think abou Lawrence all the time as christms grows closer the more things remind me of him. I had a special ornament made for him to go on the tree.