Life Changing Decisions

My time has finally come to make a life changing decision that I have been putting off. My Bill was an animal lover forever and we had a ranch of everything in California but luckily when we moved to South Carolina 4 years ago we only brought 6 horses and 2 dogs. We downsized to 3 horses when Bill's health started deteriorating and have done our best to keep up with them. The doctors felt it was good for Bill to have the fresh air and (a reason for getting up in the morning) to feed and water the horses even from his power chair. My daughter and family came here from California to help me keep this up in Bill's memory and all but we are just finding it too too much. Horses need exercise, grooming, lots of time besides just food & water. It's difficult but I told the family of my decision on Sunday and would you believe, 2 of the 3 got homes already yesterday. I feel blessed because our trainer that worked with our baby (she's 4 now) is able to take her and her mom. I feel Bill had a hand in this because he loved Jamie and her 2 sons and would be so happy to know our 2 mares are going to live with Jamie. We did decide to go ahead and keep our old guy who is 25 cus he doesn't require much and can be alone. My grandsons are happy that we won't be completely horseless, so this feels good. When I approached the kids with my decision on Sunday I emphasized the fact that we had to get beyond the "sentimental reasons" for beating our heads against the wall. We are having some tearful memories of daddy on his dear horses but they are happy tears and know this is the right decision. Financially this will be a big relief too. Horses are not cheap in anyway and I can think of lots to do with the monies not going out in feed. I hope you don't mind my sharing my story but I needed to put it in writing to see how it all really felt. Getting beyond "sentiment" is a difficult task for many of us but it can be done and can work out for good if we work thru it. Good luck to all of you on your major decision making during this difficult time. Our new lives have many challenges but we are up to it. And the rest of us are here to listen and empathize. Thank you dear friends. Hugs to all of you too

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Permalink Reply by Linda O'Connor on January 4, 2011 at 5:06pm

Kathy, you have to make the changes that are best for you. Sounds like this was a good one. The horses have a great new home with people you know & trust; and you will have extra money for what you need, and that has to be a priority. I have decided in past few weeks to sell a 2nd vehicle I have (after 2 yrs of loosing my Kevin). I thought I could afford both, but realize I'd be better without the car payment & insurance on two. I really liked the Cadi Catera better to drive, but it is an '01 (but in exceptional share & low miles), and the Trailblazer is an '05; plus better for the winter (live in Cols,OH). Kevin's brother is going to help me sell it. He is a car salesman & has lots of contacts, so I told him I needed to get enough (& hopefully little more) to pay off the loan. He has been a gem of a friend. My decision took a lot longer for me than yours did, but we have to decide things in our new life when we are ready to. Best of luck & God Bless you.

Permalink Reply by bc on January 4, 2011 at 7:36pm

There comes a time when we have to make some decisions and changes. I've had to make quite a few in the last 17 months and now I'm facing the decision of whether to stay in the house for another year or leave in the spring. I thought I had made the decision but now I'm not sure. It takes alot of thinking and analyzing but it has to be done. Pray that I make the right decision.

Linda O'Connor said:

Kathy, you have to make the changes that are best for you. Sounds like this was a good one. The horses have a great new home with people you know & trust; and you will have extra money for what you need, and that has to be a priority. I have decided in past few weeks to sell a 2nd vehicle I have (after 2 yrs of loosing my Kevin). I thought I could afford both, but realize I'd be better without the car payment & insurance on two. I really liked the Cadi Catera better to drive, but it is an '01 (but in exceptional share & low miles), and the Trailblazer is an '05; plus better for the winter (live in Cols,OH). Kevin's brother is going to help me sell it. He is a car salesman & has lots of contacts, so I told him I needed to get enough (& hopefully little more) to pay off the loan. He has been a gem of a friend. My decision took a lot longer for me than yours did, but we have to decide things in our new life when we are ready to. Best of luck & God Bless you.

Permalink Reply by Christy on January 5, 2011 at 7:13am

This is great news. It is so hard to give up animals we love like family, but a true blessing when you know they will be loved & well cared for. I'm sure this is a load off you- financially & responsibility wise. It seems like losing our loved ones is a major lesson in losing period. Many of us lose friends, possessions large & small, property, homes and even family members as a result. I feel like God is trying to teach me a lesson in "less is more." I keep seeing "store up your treasures in heaven" and similar verses. I am beginning to see that alot of my stress is directly linked to possessions I am fearful of losing. Larry's truck is my primary concern & has been from the start- it was his most prized possession & our entire family LOVES that truck- it looks great, feels great & most importantly makes us feel safe. But, GA law will not allow me to pay it off & keep it, instead it will be repossessed & sold at auction in another state! It's crazy! It feels like letting go of these things is like letting go of Larry, but that's just not true & I have to get that in my head. I have to remind myself that Larry's best gifts will remain with us always & that nobody can take them from us by any means. I have much to be thankful for.

Kathy, thanks for sharing your good news, it really helps me over my hurdles. HUGS, Christy

Permalink Reply by Virginia on January 5, 2011 at 8:03am

Kathy, you have to do what is right for you and your family. I agree with you Bill probally did give a hand in the process. As hard as it may be you have all the wonderfull memories and photos. Hugs

Permalink Reply by Debbie Treadway on January 5, 2011 at 8:30am

Kathy, thanks for sharing your story with us. I am an animal lover also and know how hard it is to part with them. At least you know they have good homes and are well taken care of. One thing I have learned from this is that we have to all do things when we are ready and everyone gets ready at different times. I am glad for you that you have been able to do something that is good for you. Hugs to you.

Permalink Reply by Elizabeth Nonnemacher on January 5, 2011 at 10:15am

Kathy; Great picture of Bill and Soleil! You made a very good decision in giving the 2 horses a new home,this will definately help you out alot. I wish you good luck in the new year and hopefully it brings you happiness and peace and more memories with your family. Sending you hugs and and prayers.

Permalink Reply by Elizabeth Nonnemacher on January 5, 2011 at 10:15am