I have read some really interesting messages written by people who sound like they know exactly how I feel. I lost my husband on Feb. 26th and feel like I am living in a horrible nightmare. He was my best friend, and my soul mate. We were together almost 13 years and I thought we would be together alot longer. He was diagnoised with stage 4 cancer in Nov. and lasted about three months. Towards the end it got really bad. It was a real eye opening experience for me and I cant seem to get it out of my mind. I am thankful he didnt linger on and suffer for long but I miss him so very much. The pain of loosing a loved one and all the loneliness it entails is horrible. We didnt have alot of friends, just mainly had each other. We both have a very small family, so their isnt alot of family support either. I too wonder if I will ever feel normal again because right now I feel like I am not really living I am only existing.I am glad to know their are others out their that sound like they are feeling just like me and that makes me feel like I am not so alone. Sometimes I feel like I am going crazy because of the way I am feeling.

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My Baby was diagnosed in May but he had sings in November 2009 going to the Dr but she orderd only a blood test not a MRI scan to a man who was an ex-smoker, coughed and lost weight feeling breathless. Guess what she said, Tear and wear, so as describe in her opinion my husband was a mechanic. After that she send him home, a typical reaction from GP in the Uk, last time i had to fight for my sons leg who had a begnin tumor growth, they told me everything was in my head. The Uk Dr are the laziest, I can speak from experience as everytime we go to Germany (my family) or his family in Italy the Dr always investigated but here they say arrogantly "There you go love, take a paracetamol and be on your way home."

He was fine most of the times, especially with chemo but radio was a bad to his chest getting infections and burns but he tolerated the radio to his spine. The care for cancer is very poor because the Dr have not or bothered to establish a preventative screening for population who is more like at risk. Working with gases, asbestos, mechnics, fumes, machinery etc... smoking is a trigger but not the full cause of Lung Cancer but STRESS is.

Cindy loved to talk more how you coped as a carer?

with hugs H


When we both got the news we were in state of shock but we read that people could survive, then we got the type of cancer on my birthday stage 4 SCLC. I just froze as I new more than him. The Dr was a total (words I am not be able to use on this site) he told my husband he will never be a grandfather to his face. I despise this man so much and hope he will go threw this himself (I do not feel guilty for writing this about an evil....) with his family (doubt he has anyone). IT WAS A TOTAL NIGHTMARE!!!

CINDY POWELL said:
cancer is horrible. it completely took hold of my husband and took him within three months. apparently the 12 radiation treatments they gave him to his tumors on the brain didnt even work. bless his heart he didnt want to die. he tried to stay positive to the bitter end. i know he was doing it for himself as well as me. i just wish he would have had some kind of symtoms when he was in the early stages so maybe he could have been cured.he was a really good person and i know that God took him quickly so he wouldnt have to suffer for long.it has all been a total nightmare and i still keep replaying it over and over in my head.i am so sorry for your situation. i am sure you were very upset to be told their wasnt any more treatment for your husband sounds like he also really wanted to live.i kept telling the dr. my husband never had any signs and the dr. said thats why they call cancer the silent killer.were you and your husband in shock to find out he had cancer?

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