I got through the 1st year anniversary of Douglas's death this past Saturday. Was it easy? Well, yes and no. I thought about him and remembered how sick he was. It would have been so selfish of me to even consider him staying here another minute or second knowing how much pain he was in. I also realize that some of us lost a spouse suddenly -- without warning. But death is death and grieving the loss of a loved one is a road all of us must travel in order to get past the loss or even acceptance of that loss. I know what I had and what I lost on July 17, 2009. Douglas was a good man, he lived a good life, and the world is a better place for his having lived. I have made peace with his death, but his loss will always be my loss, a part of my life, a part of myself that was ripped out of me. There will always be an empty corner of my soul. He would want me to go on -- and I will. Graduate school starts next month. I am planning a trip to Argentina in January with my daughter and some other gal pals! I have finally come to realize that life goes on, and I am ready to join the parade again.
I will keep all of you in my thoughts and prayers. Don't give up on yourself or healing. It will happen -- and life will once again have meaning. It will be different, but it will be good again.
Love and peace,