Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Hurting on November 3, 2010 at 5:52pm

This is just a poem, I do both shedding tears and smiling at memories. My heart hurts all the time even though I am glad for all the time spent with him.

Permalink Reply by Kay Arcuni on November 3, 2010 at 7:11pm

That is awesome. It's funny because I was just sitting here reading the letters my husband gave me when we were in highschool and he was trying to talk me into sleeping with him. They made me smile because they were just so cute. His arguement used to be if you liked ice cream you'd eat it even if people told you not too. Needless to say he was very persausive (sorry about the spelling). Thank you again!!!!!!!

Permalink Reply by bc on November 3, 2010 at 7:44pm

This is a nice poem and so true. It will be 15 months on Friday since Brad left and I've felt down all week. It's really hitting me this month probably because I know I'll be facing my birthday and then the holidays again without him here. I thought the new job would help me, it does in a way but I've had more meltdowns lately and I have to keep everything inside at work When I get home I'm exhausted but I can't sleep. I don't know why it has to keep coming back, probably because I love Brad so much and we had it all being together and now I'm alone and hurting. People think I'm strong and doing well, I must put on a good front because I'm hurting inside and this broken heart hurts.

Permalink Reply by Mary on November 3, 2010 at 8:39pm

Barb,

It is hitting you hard right now, probably because of your change in routine. You go to work and are busy, you don't forget, but it is pushed to the back of your mind. That it hits you harder when you are faced with it again. After a while your new routine will be a routine and should be better. Hand in there.

Hurting, I love the verses also, they are so true for all of us.

Permalink Reply by Barbara Roth on November 4, 2010 at 12:54am

What a beautiful poem. Barb, I understand what you mean about people thinking you're strong. Heck, I've even got my daughters fooled. They keep telling how proud they are of me. If I was doing so good, I wouldn't be here at almost 1:00 a.m. Life does go on, I just don't understand how.

Permalink Reply by Elizabeth Nonnemacher on November 4, 2010 at 3:59am

This is a Beautiful Poem, Thank you for sharing it Barb. I am trying to smile at the beautiful memories of Ron but it is so hard not to cry. Its been 5 weeks and it feels like last week. Thank God for this website because it helps to share with you all,especially in the wee hours of the nite. It is now 4:57am (cant sleep). I miss Ron terribly, and my heart is truly broken. He was always upbeat and smiling. I am trying like heck to think positive, its the hardest thing for me to do.

Permalink Reply by Jo on November 4, 2010 at 8:12am

How nice that someone has taken a step in the direction of possitive thinking! it is hard to do,but so necessary,and always dwelling on negatives and sadness won't bring them back,and won't help you move forward,which we all have to do at some point.
I would love to see a discussion of some possitive,fun,or uplifting thing that everyone does once a day.Even if you have to force yourself,which I do,good things can come.I am going to a museum today ,with my daughter to see an exhibit from China on the "Forbidden City" I am looking forward to it!It will take my mind out of myself for a while,and I will get back into the Arts,which I love,as I work for a Theatre Company.
Good luck to you all,and try a possiive experience today.Hug yourself!.

Permalink Reply by Barbara Roth on November 4, 2010 at 10:28am

Jo, thank you for the idea of doing something positive. I couldn't sleep last nite. You are right, nothing we do will bring our husbands back. Today it's been 2 wks since Jim left me. Only 2 wks, but it seems a lifetime ago. I'm scared of feeling like rhis for the rest of my life. So I will try your suggestion and do at least one positive thing each day. Wish me luck. Maybe we could have a discussion site that is half happy and half sad. Hugs to all.

Permalink Reply by Jo on November 4, 2010 at 2:14pm

I just got back from a trip to a museum and I feel so much better! i put my mind on something besides missing my Husband[almost 3 months] and I'm glad I did.i am going to continue to take baby steps towards a 'normal' life.I know it won't be but,feeling down and sad all the time won't help either.it is still a dream state and I can't fully get my head around the fact that He's gone and will never come back.That will take a long time,if ever,but I will try to make the most of my life as long as I'm here.
Think good thoughts.

Permalink Reply by Kay Arcuni on November 4, 2010 at 3:04pm

Jo I am so glad that you had such a good day. When one comes along they are wonderful. Good for you, wishing you many more.

Jo said:

I just got back from a trip to a museum and I feel so much better! i put my mind on something besides missing my Husband[almost 3 months] and I'm glad I did.i am going to continue to take baby steps towards a 'normal' life.I know it won't be but,feeling down and sad all the time won't help either.it is still a dream state and I can't fully get my head around the fact that He's gone and will never come back.That will take a long time,if ever,but I will try to make the most of my life as long as I'm here.
Think good thoughts.

Permalink Reply by Kathy King Kates on November 4, 2010 at 3:26pm

Thanks Jo. I think I am actually having a pretty good day myself. Feels funny since I am facing the knife next week but can't let myself worry about that either. I have a wonderful family that I treasure and they are here for me which I am forever thankful for. My daughter moved clear across the country to be here for me and it has been a crazy adjustment to have other people living here in my house. They love cooking so have completely taken that over which is wonderful and they are finding lots of good healthy stuff I can actually eat during this BLAND DIET stage I'm in. I look forward to these "chest pains" being gone now that bad gallbladder has finally been found. I really thought it was just acid reflux from stress. Stress, yeah, whats that.. My surgery next Wednesday and my baby brother on the 17th for pancreatic cancer. If he can laugh in the face of his surgery, how can I complain.. I hope many of you have wonderful family support. It makes all the difference for sure. Find the good stuff in your life and try to concentrate on that as much as possible. It will get better. It will get better. It will get better........Hugs

Permalink Reply by Kay Arcuni on November 4, 2010 at 3:31pm

Boy that saids like a great idea. I can't stand feeling sad all the time. I hate the thought of Joe never coming home but I also know that he wouldn't want me to be this way forever, he knows I love him.

Barbara Roth said:

Jo, thank you for the idea of doing something positive. I couldn't sleep last nite. You are right, nothing we do will bring our husbands back. Today it's been 2 wks since Jim left me. Only 2 wks, but it seems a lifetime ago. I'm scared of feeling like rhis for the rest of my life. So I will try your suggestion and do at least one positive thing each day. Wish me luck. Maybe we could have a discussion site that is half happy and half sad. Hugs to all.