My Ganddaughters miss their gandfather very much,and all the Christmas decorations at our house are memories of him. They helped me decorate.I think this is a good thing.being sad is fine too,and I think it may even bring families closer.We decided to have a sleep-over at my house and each one of us told a special memory of him.We then all had a good cry and big hugs and really felt a little better.Even though we are all suffering,we need to remember the good times and not skip Holidays or events that might be painful or sad.It is part of life and the healing process,and however long it takes is ok.

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jo: this was a good idea with the grandchildren i live in a apt.building my both sons have a family and they decorate as a family: i do not put up any christmas decorations the reason for this was both georges parents and his brother all died around christmas time: we did celebrate when the kids were small i remember my oldest always put the star on the top of the tree and my youngest put the stable under the tree this was what we did each year. now i do nothing not in the christmas spirit going over my sons house for christmas eve because they are italian and have christmas eve every year all fish for christmas i am going to my daughter in laws sister house just to be with the kids on that day i only  have one wish for christmas and that is to have my husband back but i know that will never happen in this life enjoy what you are doing with your grandaughters i have 2 grandsons twins 3 1/2 and 1 granddaughter who is 10 her mother is having another baby learned this thanksgiving day again george will not be here to enjoy this with me take care of yourself and again enjoy your  holiday

I completely understand how you feel.  It hurts me so bad to hear how much the grand kids miss their granddad!  I was determined that I was not doing Christmas this year.  As I thought about it, I did not want them to come to the house and not see a tree or presents.  They have already been through so much.  I had some of them help decorate the tree, and I made them a special 'memory' book about their granddad.  It is important that we keep the memories alive with them... they are hurting too.

Tina, I am so proud of you. You have come so far and are really starting to be more positive. That is exactly what your husband would want you to do. Memories shared are wonderful, even if they bring tears; and it is, as you say, part of life and the healing process. Keep strong & God Bless You! Hugs too! 

Yes everyone, memories shared is very important. Shared tears is okay too because they will become happy tears as we think on the happy times. I took my son-in-law and 2 grown grandsons out to Pizza Hut tonight for their all you can eat buffet. It was a happy time because they know this was something grandpa and I did every Tuesday night for over a year. Because they all live with me now I had been keeping up the tradition until I had my gallbladder surgery and we hadn't been able to do this in the past 6 weeks. They were all so happy we did this tonight and were remembering grandpa while we were there. Nice to share this happy time with them..


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