I too am new to this as husband of almost 29 years died Aug 30 after being sick for several years. I also have to get back to work tomorrow morning as our only child son 21years old is senior in college and still needs my support.
I know that I can't write anything to help anyone else going thru this pain, just wanted to let you know that you are not alone and hope that simple phrase might help.
My house is also too quiet, clean, no food to cook if I could think of something that sounded good. No dirty clothes to make a load with mine, no hand to hold the remote away from me, wanting part of the Sunday paper or scratch my back.
My husband was always studying something. He loved learning new things. I don't, I hate learning new things. Hate change. And now it is me learning to be ok being alone.
Hi everyone, I know what you are feeling. I lost my Brad 13 months and 15 days ago. It is a lonely life but I told myself and Brad on the 1st anniversary of his death in August that after all of the good things he taught me and gave to me during our life together, the very least I could give him as a gift is to think positively. He never wanted me to be sad, he was my strength, but he gave me strength and during our life together, we spent every moment making each other happy, following our dreams and making them come true. So now I think of one positive thing every morning, something to do that would make him proud of me and make him happy. If I wouldn't have had Brad to love, then my life wouldn't have been anything. I have no regrets except that our time together was way too short. I've felt the same way as most of you who's grief is fresh, and its not that I don't miss Brad and I am lonely and I want to be with him, but I want him to be proud of me so that's my gift to him in thanks for every day we had together. It is hard, I still cry, swear and miss him every night, but I've found that by pushing myself every day to be positive makes me feel better about myself. It will never go away, you will never forget, but it will get easier to deal with. Stick on this site and you will see. God Bless all of you! Hugs everyday