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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

Members: 1377
Latest Conversations: Oct 10

This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

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Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Terry Kent Mar 7, 2022. 6 Replies

Universe

Started by Julie. Last reply by DJ Dec 6, 2020. 1 Reply

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31, 2020. 13 Replies

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Comment by sherry eagen on November 17, 2009 at 7:01pm
My husband passed away Nov. 7th, 2009. He was diagnosed with terminal cancer Oct. 8th, 2009. He was at home when he died and I was his caretaker. I seem to be doing ok, but then a thought of him comes into my head, or I touch something that was his, and I start crying again. How long will this last...
Comment by Kathy on November 17, 2009 at 10:51am
I'm new here. Removed my husband from life support two years ago today and he passed away on November 19, 2007. Reliving the pain again and having a hard time.
Comment by Linda McMurtrey on November 16, 2009 at 1:52am
Lost my husband on 10/9. I am still numb & having a hard time getting by, day by day.
Comment by hazel dickerson on November 15, 2009 at 4:20pm
I lost my husband Suddenly November30th o8 to Cardiac arrest he died in front of myself and two of our sons it is almost a year without him and people tell me that the grieving process get better but to me it does not get any better and the loneliness seems to get even worse I came over here from Liverpool England to join my husband who was stationed at Croughton AFB in England i moved over her in the 70s but since he is no longer with us i feel so lost I do go to bereavement groups and find some comfort from going i was glad to read some of the other letters as you feel as though you are going out of your mind sometimes sudden death is the worst thing you can imagine.
Comment by Ericka Bryant on November 9, 2009 at 10:25am
To Bernadette: I know what you mean about not wanting to be here any more, but life does go on and you'll start to find a new normal. It won't ever be the same, and your husband's death is a part of your life now. Allow your friends and family to do things for you, and lean on them for support and comfort. No, it's not the same thing, but it is better than nothing. Call up a friend you can trust and have them come over or meet them for tea or something. Talk about what you need to talk about. Let the tears flow. It's all part of the healing process. Big hugs to you!
Comment by Liz on November 9, 2009 at 7:46am
In 10 days, it will be 10 months since the I found the love of my life dead on my bedroom floor. We didn't know he was sick. He was 27 yrs old and I was 6 days away from turning 28. Never did we imagine this would happen to us. We had 2 kids who were 2 and 1 at the time. I wouldn't wish what I witnessed that morning on anyone, not even my worst enemy or the person that caused all this to start. But my comment to Bernadette is this, you can find love again. It may never the same level of love that you had with your soul mate. But I wouldn't want that level again bc the love my husband and I shared was so special and it comes around once in a lifetime. But u can find that person who loves u unconditionally and knows u have been through he'll and is accepting that while they may not be the love of ur life, they know u love them more than anything and are willing to support you through it all. They are out there. They may be few and far between but they are out there
Comment by Bernadette on November 9, 2009 at 7:27am
it has been 8 months and 10 days since i lost the only and one i can ever love or will love. people say that you are a young woman and that you will find someone new. where do they get that notion. when you find your soul mate there is no way you would settle for anyone less. life is a struggle, challenge and difficult, due to the fact that after 31 years with one company, they wouldnt even come to the party and offer my husband the diginty of a redunacy, so that he could see his small family looked after. the two adult childrren have not gone without. but as a mum i have again put my life on hold. im tired, tired of the world spinning and life just moving on. tired of been brave. tired because i can't sleep, tired b4cause i just don;t want to be here, and so tired of been lonley, been sad, and having feelings of bitterness of couples doing the things that couples do.Struggling that i can no feel my love, around me, or even signs that i have followed his wishes out well, and that he even loved me. having a bas night. and been the internet and never doing this before, i doublt if anything will come of it. if someone reads this thats lovely. if not some how i will try to go on, but i just want to sleep and not wake up
Comment by Debbie on November 9, 2009 at 4:21am
i just dont know where to start?? I just lost my mother on Oct 26,2009 and my husband on Oct 29,2009. Both within just two days.My heart feels so heavy.
Comment by Jeanne on November 7, 2009 at 2:50pm
I lost the love of my life also to lung and liver cancer five months ago...I feel your pain....He was sick for 1 1/2 years...It was so horrible to watch this once vibrant man turn into a skelitan....It would have been better to have gone more quickly. Putting one foot in front of the other and reaching out to friends and family...I am going to join a new church tomorrow. And play lots of cards and games that are offered in my community.
It is sooo hard, but you must look forward and be the way he would want you to be.....I know my love is in heaven and looking down...I wish he were here, but we are not dead...we have to for our kids and for ourselves...
Hope you can gather the strength to go one step at a time, one minute at a time and one day at a time.
Comment by Denise MacCallum on November 6, 2009 at 1:46pm
Comment by Denise on November 5, 2009
I lost my husband on October 20. 2009...He was diagnosed with lung and liver cancer on September 2009..He had been sick for 3 months before the cancer robbed him of his life....I'm still numb and cry all the time...I shared my life with this kind, wonderful man for 40 years...I don't know how I'm going to go on without him...We were planning our future now I don't have one...I don't sleep and hardly eat...My family and friends are very supportive but it doesn't really help...Rob is the only one who can help me and he is gone..
 

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