Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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Comment by deborah peck on March 1, 2021 at 7:45am

Certainly a wide controversy on do or don't the vaccine, all of my siblings have had at least the first one, my brother had both, he was in bed all weekend but still considers it worth it, my daughter who is a nurse says not to get it yet, too new for safety , so its definitely a personal choice , just interesting to hear the different views, thank you all for your input, have a great week

Comment by Marsha H on February 26, 2021 at 5:58am

Deborah ...

I am sorry I haven't put the website on here as promised, but unfortunately, the Physcians and Surgeons website took it off.  MMMM????  I managed to get this one for you to explain things a little more and it all boils down to the fact these vaccines came way to fast without testing on humans longer.  REMEMBER, WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT AND SOME MAY DO WELL ON IT AND OTHERS NOT.

Also, be prepared if you decide to get it to have someone else with you for a day or so and don't go to work for a day or so according to doctors who insist on people taking the vaccine.  Side effects that are common is headaches; extremely tired and aches and pains.  The first shot doesn't appear to have these symptoms according to doctors, but the second one certainly does and what does our Health Canada say about that ...  mainly suck it up!  Nice!  

Again I stress that if you don't feel right about it at the moment take your time to decide.  Many people in Canada are waiting to see.  I have had 3 friends who have had their 2 shots and 2 of them couldn't get out of bed for 2 days as they were so drained and tired with a headache, yet my other friend was fine.  What some doctors don't realize is each individual is different and also don't take into consideration medications that person may be on or what type of illness they may have.  Some doctors are very wary of who to give the vaccine too.

I'm not trying to scare anyone, but this is what is reported here in Canada and some of the U.S. 

You will know when the time is right.  For those like Steve and Chuck I'm happy they have had their shot and doing well. 



Comment by Mary. Jane on February 26, 2021 at 1:15am
  1. I feel the same way as you, Deborah. I’m sure it will b ok in the long run..and IF I was an ACTIVE healthcare worker, I would probably get it.
  2. otherwise, I am in the “wait and see” camp. 
  3. ( I have no idea what this format just happened).
  4. beside, I go out once a week to the grocery store with a mask. Melinda drives me. We have to follow our gut.
Comment by deborah peck on February 24, 2021 at 1:37pm

Thank you for your thoughts. I didn't end up getting the shot. my gut just tells me not to, why I don't know, I guess I am  just scared of the unknown. I feel guilty Steve because there are so many that are waiting and here I am 65 perfectly healthy but with a chance to get one that I am letting go by. I hope whoever wants one is able to soon, I honestly think its a good thing to do, just cant get past my head

Comment by Steve G. on February 24, 2021 at 7:53am

Hi Deborah,

I know a lot of folks in the medical industry here in Dallas who have all had their injections and are really glad they did.  I and Chuck signed up back in late January for ours as we fall into a group of seniors with certain health issues, however, they are so many like us that the wait is still ongoing and the number of vaccines available are slow here in Texas.  We will wait until they send us our appointment and then proceed forward.

Honestly, I can wait and see, but if the appointment comes we will go.

During the past snow storm we did invite some very close friends to stay at our home during the crises.  One of them had taken both shots with no side effects, the other one is still waiting.  He is tested every two weeks by his company.  we were glad we could accommodate their needs as they had no power or water.  We were fortunate to have both with a boil water for just 3 days and it was not so bad.  we all respected each others privacy and personal space.  It felt good to be able to help someone in need.

Hugs to you today as you ponder what to do...

each of us must follow our "gut" feeling these days.  What is good for one person may not be good for others...


Comment by deborah peck on February 24, 2021 at 7:34am

Im supposed to get the first shot this morning but am petrified, my brother got his but I am definitely in the wait and see group. I just need my life back to normal so I signed up for today but the closer I get the more excuses I keep making for not going, so confused, I will let you know what I decide

Comment by Mary. Jane on February 23, 2021 at 10:16pm

I feel the same way...everything seems fine now, With the injection..but to me, it hasn,t really been tested. So I am in the “wait and see” camp. It,scares me when I see folks clambering to be first in line,

Comment by Marsha H on February 23, 2021 at 9:09pm

Hi Deb ...  Oh boy getting the vaccine or not is such a touchy subject.  This is my own opinion for ME!  I'm in my 70's.  I've done a lot of research on the Covid Vaccine and some of the Physicians and Surgeons online say 'no.'  I will look for the link and put it online tonight.  

I live in British Columbia, Canada.  They told us to wear masks and then months later said the masks did little.  Now the suggest 2 - 3 masks, but with just one mask some people find it hard to breath and also hard to hear anyone as their voices are muffled.  Then Health Canada was giving us figures of who died of COVID and later found that these numbers were inacurrate and not as high as made out to be.  Health Canada promised those who wanted the vaccine to get one shot and wait a few weeks and get their 2nd shot and now they say only one shot is necessary.  What I'm saying is they just keep changing things around too often.  There is also information that just because you get the COVID shot doesn't mean you can't get it.  Around and around we go.  They also say that they have no idea how these vaccines will affect our bodies in the future.  Also all viruses mutate.  So my friend, it's strictly up to you and I back anyone who chooses to get it, but do your homework.  

I have chosen against it.  I got the Hong Kong flu in the 60's and it was super bad, so much so that the hospitals were so jammed packed my mom had to get the doctor to come see me and give me a shot to stop me from up-chucking.  It took me 3 weeks to get over it, but I survived and so did others.  The death toll was high back the, but there was no mask wearing or lock-downs.  Our immune system needs to fight off some virus and it's strengthened by doing so.  Several doctors have said that very thing.  Of course I do believe in vaccines for children for polio, small pox, etc.  

If your gut is saying to get it then I would get it, but if you aren't in a hurry please talk to more than one doctor about this.  It's your body.  Many here are 'waiting to see' re others getting the vaccine shot.  

Good luck and do what you think is right.



Comment by Mary. Jane on February 23, 2021 at 5:21pm

Hello everyone. Today is TUESDAY .Feb 23 2021.

Five years ago on this exact date, it was ALSO a Tuesday...when,@ 1:51 PM, my beloved Bob, gave up his fight, with Brain cancer, and died.It was wonderful he was HOME, with myself, and our kitty Rudy. Rudy is 12 years old now..That night, Rudy hoped up on our bed, (Bob was in a hospital bed. ) and, has slept there ever since. This year has been harder, as my long forgotten memories have returned. Yes, I am healing, I can remember everything now...peoples names, thing we did together ..I KNEW these memories would return, and they make me smile. We had 48 years, and 8 months.,and  I will always love you, Bob. Always.

Comment by DJ on February 23, 2021 at 3:39pm

Mary Jane; its great that memories which make you smile are back!


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