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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

Peace

Discussion Forum

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Terry Kent Mar 7. 6 Replies

Universe

Started by Julie. Last reply by DJ Dec 6, 2020. 1 Reply

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31, 2020. 13 Replies

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Comment by Chicago Beard on February 27, 2022 at 1:59pm

Steve

Very interesting story about Bella. Also, love the Addams Family display. 

Comment by Steve G. on February 27, 2022 at 8:30am

Here is a picture of our fireplace, please note that we use it for various displays, currently it has Chucks' version of the Adams Family, just above it is the wood carving I noted.  Enjoy your day today.

love

steve

Comment by Steve G. on February 27, 2022 at 8:05am

Dear Mary Jane,

Ghosts and Angels appear in and out of our lives on their own timetable, so when we are expecting them to show up, they tend to disappoint us.  The best gifts from them are the ones when we least expect them.  The other morning, we were sitting on the sofa and the sunlight from the morning sun was shining tjhru the dining room window blinds and managed to cast what looked like a Celtic Cross onto a small wooden oval carving of two dogs facing each other.  This carving hangs just over the fireplace in our living room.  The dog in question looks like mine and Marks beloved dog Bella who passed away just before my move up to NJ just 4 years after Marks's passing.  The night she died she was weak and to sick to move, laying on her bed in the living room staring out at the patio glass doors.  Just before she died, she suddenly sat up sitting and wagging her tail and whining at the glass doors.  I asked her what she saw and she just looked at me with her happy face and back to the doors just staring and wining and happy.  This lasted only a minute or two then she laid back down and went to sleep.  I kept watching her and I got the strongest feeling that she saw Mark waiting for her.  I was overwhelmed with happy grief and comfort, falling to sleep myself.  A couple of hours later I woke up and discovered that Bella had passed on.

The sun shining on that little carving with a Celtic Cross brought back that memory.  Mark loved the Celtic Cross and just about anything Celtic.  So, I took it as a message from Mark and Bella.  And, once again my eyes filled with tears; but not the hurting kind, these were tears of joy, for two of my loves let me know they are always watching.

I have had other encounters that i will share another time.

Take care Mary Jane, sending you lots of hugs and love.

Comment by Charles E. Nelson on February 25, 2022 at 9:01am

PS to Mary Jane -

We cherish you right back!!!

Comment by Charles E. Nelson on February 25, 2022 at 8:55am

Dear Mary Jane,

I'm sure yesterday gave you many thoughts and feelings that to some might be considered "out there" as you say, but not so here. We react differently to each anniversary, holiday, and birthday, even from year to year. When I first joined ( with many more members posting ) there were posts cautioning and describing feelings being more heightened and difficult on the 2nd year of a loss, or third, etc. Over time I have learned that approaching each anniversary of Larry's passing is like receiving an unmarked package in the mail - you won't know what's inside until you open it, and that unknown can bring anxiety sometimes. It sounds like you had a fairly calm day, and after your recent experience I'm very glad for that!

Thanks for the tip about the show - I'll check it out. I hope you continue to find diversions and activities that encourage laughter, because I believe we need to keep some humor in our lives. I find mine in movies, TV, and often in myself - as I've said here before, in our home I provide the "comic relief", usually just by being myself.

Be well, and keep laughing - 

Love, Chuck

Comment by Mary. Jane on February 23, 2022 at 5:02pm

(OMG, not HER again..yup LOL) Today is the 6th anniversary of Bobs death. I had some wild notion he might pop in for a visit.Nope. Didn,t happen...I guess maybe he was “Sucked Off”..(which is the phrase the ghosts in a new TV program use When an earthbound spirit finally gets into heaven)...don,t freak out..this is my weird way of BEGGING y’all, to watch GHOSTS! On CBS Thursday nights..it is the FUNNIEST thing I have seen in YEARS on TV. It is about a young couple who inherits a huge mansion, and finds it occupied with about 20 people who have passed on, but at various past eras. I like it so much, I have binge watched it 3 times. FINALLY a witty, well cast and well written program, amongst the usual swill.  The best thing...I laugh all the way through each episode. 

No, not a word or feeling or dream, from Bob. Today marks 6 years...and. Where ever he is, I hope we meet again in the next life. Yes, I believe in re-incarnation, and that we are always with the same people in each lifetime. Go with God, Bob

(Thanks for letting me get a bit “out there” today..I cherish all of you here.) MJT

Comment by Trina Mamoon on February 20, 2022 at 2:52pm

Dear Mary Jane,

Sounds very scary what you experienced. Sending healing prayers your way.

Hugs, Trina

Comment by Mary. Jane on February 20, 2022 at 2:44pm

This is how it started..Thursday morning, I took a routine blood test, The we went out for the day..my Dr left me a phone message which I didn,t get until around 7 or 8 pm..on Thursday...saying my hemo globin was 6.8 (11 is normal) and for me to go into the ER NOW! So, Friday morning, I went, and was sooo bad I needed a blood transfusion. Who knew? They did another blood test when I got there..it had gotten worse, so I stayed there until 8 pm..with a tube with someone else’s blood entering my arm.

i NEVER get sick,  o health problems at all until this. Now I am worried about everything, weak and tires and still shocked this happened. Thank u for letting me ramble.

MT

Comment by Mary. Jane on February 20, 2022 at 2:23pm

Thank you all so much, I am touched by your posts. ...yes, I was terrified...I was perfectly healthy until now...when I came home, I slept for 2 days....soo I take iron pills and hope for the best. Melinda is still here...cooking and caring  for me. I am kind of shell shocked by the entire ordeal, even now...can,t seem to focus or understand stuff like I used to. Kind of a trauma ...but I will be ok.

ok it is NAP TIME! Again, thank you!

Comment by Steve G. on February 20, 2022 at 10:27am

Mary Jane,

Hang in there, emergency room visits for any reason is scary for me, let alone a stay in the hospital.  Please know that you are and still in my prayers each day.  Praying for a speedy recovery and God's loving embrace of a very dear sister.

Hugs to you and your family,

Steve G

 

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