I lost my wonderful Daddy to brain cancer August 11th of this year. My grief comes in waves - one day OK, one day I am torn apart. I am having a difficult time getting life back on track in many ways, and I am usually fine with that. It has been an incredibly difficult year and I need as much time as I need. But what do you do when your partner, who by all means is a wonderful, loving, supportive person, but has never experienced the death of a parent, cannot understand grief and its many side effects?
I have lost count now of the disagreements we have had. I of course fly off the handle because I am so sensitive about it, and quite frankly, a bit selfish as I feel entitled to get through this any way that I can. I finally had to insist that we avoid discussing anything about this past year unless he could tread very lightly. All of the decisions I made, etc. were mine to make and until he lived though this experience I did not need his judgements because all it was doing was making me want to distance myself from him. I then excused myself, and told him I was going to get the rest of my tears out in private in the backyard. So far it seems to have sunk in. One part of me feels like "poor guy, dealing with crazy me", and another part is just enraged that someone I plan on spending my life with can be so oblivious to the biggest loss in my life thus far...my Daddy "Daddio".
Has anyone else experienced this? Is it pointless to expect someone untouched by the death of their parent to ever understand? Should I be moving through my grief faster? I would love some input as this issue has really gotten to me. Thank you and peace to you all in this holiday season...the first without my sweet Daddio.