Time is flying by. I still can’t believe it has been over 3 months since my Mom died on Sept 28th, 2010. I still listen to her voice on my phone when she left a message for me in July... not every single day but often I listen to her. For some reason which I can’t logically understand I still feel like I want to pick up the phone to call her or when I leave my house I sometimes start driving towards her place. Sometimes it feels like I forgot she has passed away although I think about how much I miss her daily! Just yesterday when I arrived home the very first thing I thought of when I walked in the door was to listen to phone messages to see if Mom had called. I stopped at the phone and asked my husband…what is wrong with me…that I would think this… especially 3 months after she has been gone? Does anyone else feel like this? I know I probably feel this way because obviously it has been a habit or routine for years but now with Mom gone I can’t believe these thoughts keep crossing my mind. It just makes me really sad when I realize in my heart she is truly gone forever and there will never be another message for me to hear. My heart aches for her so much! Sometimes I feel like a child…I just want her back, I want her back! I try to be grateful that she had a full 80 years but Lord do I ever miss her. I miss you Mom!
It's been 7 months since I lost my mom and I still want to call her. We always talked at least once a day before she got sick and every time any thing happens in my life, she's the first one I want to call. Then it takes your breath away when you remember you can't tell her. My mom had 90 years but the last two she wasn't well and her mind was bad. Sometimes she didn't know us but you could always tell that she really liked us. I know my mom wouldn't have wanted to live the way she did for the past two years and in my mind, I know she's better but it sure is hard getting the heart to understand.
I'm so sorry you are experiencing so much hurt right now chain villareal. I have been down in the depths of despair myself after losing my mom and stepdad in an accident. It is a very real experience to feel that way and it's part of grieving. Please know that there are so many of us who wake up and go to bed with similar feelings... in between we find the small pockets of tenderness and relief which come from friends, a flower, a nice word said to you, and with each day, the list of moments of tenderness grow. Please watch your soul turn towards healing instead of towards despair. --jamie
chain villareal said:
hello i lost my mom oct 31 2010 she was 50 we were in a bad car accident i only wish i had her voice to hear again im so depressed i just wanna hear her voice again im 30 years old and i feel the same way u do i just want her back i wanted to go with her
Yes we absolutely all go through this. My sister and I talk about this all the time. Our Mom passed away a year ago Christmas Eve. We also talk about how we will be doing something at home and think to ourselves, "gee after I finish doing this I am going to call Mom". I don't think this ever leaves you. We experienced the super-market thing too. So many emotions. What is so comforting is we all seem to feel so similarly. And that is certainly O.K. We will all always miss them, and what is also very important is taking the time we each need to go through this process. I know what you mean about just wanting her back...
Hi Deeanne. Thank you so much for your reply. I have no doubt whatsoever that my mom is in heaven. She was a very good lady and taught us all to believe in God. That comforts me a great deal to know she is there with my dad and my grandparents. She talked about seeing them a lot before she died. I truly believe that at times she was seeing them. I'm so sorry for your loss and with it just happening, I know exactly how much it hurts. You're in my heart and in my prayers.