Hi, I am new to this website.  My parents died last year.  My Dad on 17 June 2010 and My Mum on 11 September 2010.  It's nearly a year since my Dad died and I'm learning to live without my parents.  I am 43 years old, are there others out there who have lost both parents???

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I lost my Mother May 11, 2009 and my Father January 27, 2010. Both were very ill. It took me some time to deal with it, though it's still hard. My saving grace is that I am at the place in my mind that it would be very selfish of me to want them back in the state they were in. While I miss them dearly and go visit them at the cemetery as often as my heart will let me, I would not want them in the pain and anguish they were going through to stay. I see them everywhere and hear them at times, well sort of, I find myself saying and doing things they did without knowing it until it's brought to my attention. I had hoped to have them with me longer, but on the good days I know they are sitting with Jesus and waiting for me to join them some day. On the bad days I still want them here. There was so much I should have asked about when they were young and just starting out, and now I will never really know my parents as people. As long as you keep their memory alive they are never to far away. I am 55 and the only girl out of 5 kids. I wasn't able to be near (at the airport, in route) when my mother died. I was taking care of my father and was able to be holding his hand as he transitioned. I don't know really which hit me the hardest. But I will tell you it was like someone had a hold of my heart and squeezed it like a sponge at first. My crying days are fewer, but my missing days are every day. As you can tell I still ramble and have a little problem with concentration, but they say that will pass. The best advice I can give is if you feel like crying, cry. If you feel like laughing, laugh. There is noone that can give you a time factor of how long it will take for you to make peace with the situation. Take it day by day and soon you will find that you will cry less and laugh more when thinking of the folks. Sending sunshine smiles and rainbow wishes your way.
Dear Angela...I feel for you lossing both your parents in the same year...my Dad died April 4th- six years ago and my Mom April 2nd of this year...I am 41 and feel so odd- almost like a child again, I feel alone even thou I have a wonderful husband, a 3yr old and great extened family and friends...as one of my friends expressed it (who also has neither parent) ...we are no longer a daugther...I took care and lived next door to my Mom so there was a definte void in my day to day routine...wish I could have taken care of my Dad but he lived further a way...I so very much miss calling them for advice, a cheer up or just to chat...here's wishing you lots of peace as you heal...praying for all of us...Linda:)
Dear Angela...I feel for you lossing both your parents in the same year...my Dad died April 4th- six years ago and my Mom April 2nd of this year...I am 41 and feel so odd- almost like a child again, I feel alone even thou I have a wonderful husband, a 3yr old and great extened family and friends...as one of my friends expressed it (who also has neither parent) ...we are no longer a daugther...I took care and lived next door to my Mom so there was a definte void in my day to day routine...wish I could have taken care of my Dad but he lived further a way...I so very much miss calling them for advice, a cheer up or just to chat...here's wishing you lots of peace as you heal...praying for all of us...Linda:)

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