My mother passed away in late December.  Though she had a chronic health condition, it was complicated by an accidental fall which utlimately caused her death.  My friends can only understand to a certain extent.  I am young to have lost a parent (34 years old) and can't stand when I have "downtime" because it causes me to feel anxious and overwhelmed with emotion.  I am looking for others who can identify with these symptoms of grief.  Some days are okay, mostly when I keep busy, but the minute I sit down for a break, the feelings return.  I have been trying to do things to keep her memory alive (ie. walks for the condition she had, making tributes to her in small days, and seeking to change careers to support others with chronic illness).  But, mom is still not here in physical precense.  Can anyone identify with my story?

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Yes I definitely can identify with you Laurin, my mother also passed late December of last year.  I have done the same things you've described daily.  While working I'm fine, but give me one second where my mind can jump to thinking about her and it does.  What's worse is when I call my dad to try and get some comfort from him I end up making him feel bad to so I have to keep all of this bottled up inside.  All I can tell you is to keep putting one foot in front of the other and try to manage your grief by talking it out to others.  If you have those friends that think you should move on, find another one that will listen and continue to voice your hurt until you can begin to bare it more.  I'll be praying for you.

My dad, who was my whole world, passed in April, I was responsible for all decisions for medical, financial, legal, funeral, etc, so I was busy for awhile, and just now started having my little, what I call nervous breakdowns...  So, I took a leave of absence, cuz i think if i keep putting off addressing the fact that I will never hear his voice, or see him or touch him again, I will end up in the psyche unit somewhere. So sorry for your losses!!!

Lauren,

My mom passed away December 2010. I am a teacher...I work hard during the year..Last summer

the summer after my mom had passed I think I was still in shock...I went to Paris...and now this summer 2012 (one year and half after my mom, Vicky's death), I have time off..and anxiety ..particularly in the mornings... and other emotions surface...seems worse than last year..I think.

It's all so normal. So want you to know you are not alone.

Theresa

Lauren, I too can relate, my Mom passed away March 2012. I saw her everyday, talked to he everyday. She was healthy, did things on her own, self sufficient...she got sick in November 2011, and no one could figure out what was wrong, until it was too late. She wasted away. She was everything to me. She raised us four kids all on her own. Now I cry everyday, I physically feel as if my heart is broken. I went to the dr an my blood pressure was 171/91...the dr said it definately could be a physical system of my grief. It made me realize I need help, and I need to reach out. Or I'll be next...and I ave a 7yr old little boy who needs me. Lauren you are not alone...it is horrible, my husband said something to me that stuck with me. "you will never get over loosing your Mom, you will get through it"....

Ladies I think a part of us go's with everyone we loose, with that tho I can feel my mom around, is does take time hope this  helps :)

Hi,

My dad passed in the early part of July. He had heart disease but, it was complicated by a esopagus problem. Unfortunately, one of my friend's dad passed away from esophageal cancer so, she understands how I feel. I was 32-years-old when I lost my dad. I work two volunteer jobs which I LOVE but, I always think of my dad at my jobs as he volunteered at the places where I volunteer. I sometimes can't stand being alone but, sometimes I do as it makes me scared and overwhelmed with emotion. I'm usually O.K. but, the minute I lay down I just break down and cry. Now we do things in his memory like go to a cafe and have a cannoli which he never did and he LOVED to read and there are books and he traveled for his job and there are some postcards from other countries. He may not be here but, I feel him alot.

 

Lori Sherry

 

Yes I can. My Mom was the back bone of our family, every time we had cookouts,birthday parties,family reunion she was the one getting thing s together. Her Fried Chicken and Mac and Cheese was the best in town, I will not eat nobody Mac and Cheese. As long as I'm busy I'm ok. My down time is what gets me to. Aug 4 is her b-day so thats going to be a Sad but Happy day, We is raising Money for Lung Cancer. I know Shes Smiling down and saying My Fam and Friends is showing me Love :)

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