Gay and lesbians who have lost partners


Gay and lesbians who have lost partners

Who is there for us??

Members: 212
Latest Conversations: Aug 24

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Recent Loss

Started by Aaron R Gould. Last reply by John DiLorenzo Jr Aug 24. 2 Replies

On March 4th, 2021, my partner Kyle committed suicide, by shotgun to the head. I found him in his car, and have been feeling incredibly anxious and alone since then. He always struggled with mental…Continue

Lost my Partner of 5 years

Started by James James. Last reply by John Baluyut Apr 18. 3 Replies

Hello, My name is Jim.   Last month I lost my partner and best friend of 5 years unexpectedly.   The grief and sense of loss is so overwhelming,    In a single instance my life has been turned upside…Continue


Started by Tony Przybyla. Last reply by Kevin Dadouses Apr 18, 2020. 1 Reply

lost my partner of  42 yrs last may.  still hurts and this stay at home isolates even more. hard to move forward but am trying.  have been out of touch w/ gay community for last 15-20 yrs...due to…Continue

Looking for people who can understand my loss

Started by Amanda. Last reply by Amy Bartola Sep 3, 2019. 10 Replies

Hello, my name is Amanda. I lost my partner over 3 years ago. It was a sudden and unexpected loss. I'm still grieving and struggling with it. I came on here hoping to find people who could understand…Continue

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Comment by Carl Schatz on August 20, 2013 at 4:36pm

Thank you all for the comments and kind words. I'm working my way through this. Not easy, but I'll make it.

Comment by Christopher Ruggles on August 17, 2013 at 4:39pm

It seems we have a number of new members, since I last logged in.  To all of you, you have my sincere heartfelt sympathies.  The path you were thrust on, is not an easy one.  The path of grief is irrational and often times confusing.  Please know that you are not alone.  We may not be able to meet you in person, however, we all try very hard to be here for you online.  Feel free to reach out to me at any time.

Comment by Michael Reikowsky on August 16, 2013 at 3:08pm
Hi Carl & everyone else...
I agree - I miss the hugs, the holding hands, the little things the most. My Danny was a very loving and gentle man. He gave the warmest hugs. Platonic between finds and those between us. I miss his soft touch, the way he would push the hair out of my eyes and tell me it was time for a Haircut. Lol

I am sorry or your loss. I'm sorry for all of our losses. I am grateful for the friendships extended here. It helps to be able to talk and not worry that pronouns will upset people.

Even with all the positive change happening for marriage equality, tolerance (I really do hate that word).... I still, at times, feel that's great for others, too late for me... I lost the best part of me when Danny passed on. I try to go on as I know he would of wanted, but its a dily challenge.

One step forward, to stps back. Ya know?
Comment by Carl Schatz on August 16, 2013 at 2:41pm

Thank you John

For me it seems the most difficult part is that I haven't got someone close enough that will hold me and give me a big hug. I'm lacking the close companionship that a human person could give. Mostly I miss Franks warm body beside me. Nothing can ever replace that.

Thank you for the encouraging words.


Comment by Carl Schatz on August 16, 2013 at 11:40am

Thank you very much Nancy. You have a big heart. All kind words make a difference.


Comment by Nancy Kennedy on August 16, 2013 at 10:40am

Carl: My heart is with you, having lost in March 2012 my partner of 28+ years. I honestly didn't think I could go on but the higher power had me get up & tend to other things like two elderly parents in their 90s with dementia. I could feel her with me. So, too, Frank is there. And, here are people who understand. Your circle has become bigger because of Frank. Peace! Nancy                                                     

Comment by Carl Schatz on August 16, 2013 at 10:30am

I just lost the love of my life of 30 years. Frank died in the hospital after a long illness. We don't have any close friends with us any more and there is no support group for this in our area. I'm hurting very bad need someone to share with.


Comment by Scott on July 17, 2013 at 5:33pm

Hi Everyone.  Dave, my partner of 13 years died in my arms here at home from liver cancer that was diagnosed in February.  I'm profoundly grateful that even though it was so quick he didn't have so many of the awful symptoms that can accompany that disease.  He was so darn stoic though and never said much of anything must likely because he didn't want me to worry (like that wasn't going to happen!)  My Mom died in January but losing your partner sure brings up different emotions, thoughts, and fears.  We both felt really fortunate that everyone we came in contact with from the doctors to nurses to the hospice team to even the mortician were extremely supportive and understanding and we didn't have to deal with any bigotry that I know happens with other folks.

His being gone does hurt and leave a huge void.  I'm also realizing how much he did around the house, yard, and the vehicles.  I have zero skill and those areas and that really has been an additional stress. 

Trying to just take time to grieve and think.  Want to continue forward and will take him with me into whatever life has planned for me until we meet up again but right now, I still don't know what my purpose really is.  A friend said it pretty well I thought - "sounds like you are adrift and you see the shore but you can't find the harbor and the moorings.  I hope I do in time.  

Thanks for listening.


Comment by Sandy Smith on July 17, 2013 at 3:29pm
I write for Mary Ann. Wish I could get 1.4 million hits......course it would have to be a bit more progressive than this.....sigh.....
Comment by Sandy Smith on July 17, 2013 at 3:16pm
As I wish Mary Ann was here to share.....but you and I both know that Danny and Mary Ann share every moment of every day with us!

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