Hi Barb,

Great to hear from you.  I was getting a little concerned about you.  I'm sure you are still struggling.  It has been a year and half for me and honestly I have been so depressed lately.  The holidays don't help and then three months ago I got laid off from my jog.  My entire world is upside down.  I'm grieving the loss of my husband and trying to find another job.  Finding a job when you are in your sixties is not easy.  Well enough of my complaining.  You stay strong and prayers and hugs are being sent your way.

Marie

Barb, please check in, we haven't heard from you in awhile, are u still in Florida?

Hope everything is if only a little better for you.

Hugs my friend.

Elvia

Hi Barb, how are you? let us know, haven't heard from you lately, are you back in Jersey?

No changes here, the crying hasn't stopped, so what else in new? miss him more every day, looking forward to going away & not looking forward, need the relaxation but not without him, can't seem to accept his death & I am a woman of faith but to be honest, I still question why him? why my family yet again, but you know my feelings because they are the same as yours, anyway keep us posted.

Hugs,

Elvira

Hi Barb, haven't been coming to the site, just wanted to check who u are doing? haven't heard from you in awhile, hope u are feeling better, no sense in talking about me, same here, not a day goes by that I don't cry, there was a mass for him this past sunday & then we all went to the mausoleum, going on vacation on Sept 13th, don't know how I am going to handle being on a plane & on vacation without him, just feel so lonely even thought my sister lives with me.

Hope we can get together one I come back from vacation.

Always in my prayers,

Elvira

Don't you dare apologize for rambling, I do all the time & I can certainly understand how you are feeling especially today, because today was a pretty bad day for me also, I haven't stopped trying, every single thing today reminded me of Pablo & all I could do was cry, my sister is very understanding but right now even my kids are telling me I need to stop or just plainly ignore me when I am crying, they don't realize they both have their lives with their wives & I am ecstatic for them but they fail to see that my life with my life partner is over & even though I live with my sister it is simply not the same, not when you are used to having a husband that was always with you & that somebody was with you when you went to bed every night, so there I was also rambling but it's okay because you & I know what we are feeling & nobody in going to take that away from us, I miss him more every day & I don't see that changing any time soon.

Sorry we were both feeling so bad today, I pray every day for acceptance but it's not working, sending many hugs,

Elvira

Barb,

Its been a year and everything you just said I still feel.  It scares me when I think about never seeing my husband again. And yes what is our purpose in life.  Friends and family tend to move on and not keep in touch as much and we are left alone.  You, Elvira and I will get through this as best we can.  Our lives will never be the same but maybe in time we can smile once again.  Nice talking to you.

Marie

Good Morning Barb!  I wanted to see how you are doing before I leave on my Scandinavian trip on Friday.  As I was telling Elvira, all the preparation has increased my anxiety levels.  It's just too much to do for one person when we are used to our husbands helping out.  I hope your okay.  I know you had an anniversay date recently and that can be quite sad.  Just hang in there, one day at a time.  Take care of yourself and I will post upon my return.

Marie

Hi Barb, we must be twins somehow, I had a horrendous day today, all I did today was cry everywhere I went, on the 9th it will be 6 months or Pablo, I miss him more every day, went to the mall to buy some vacation clothes & just couldn't take him off my mind, had a dream with him a couple of nights ago but could not remember later what it was about, I wish he would come to me in a dream to tell me he is okay, I need to know, I miss him more & more every day & I am certainly not getting any better, I just don't see any improvement in my feelings.

Are you staying in Florida for more time? I leave on vacation on Sept 13th for 2 weeks.

I pray we all start to feel better, all three of us.

Thanks for checking in,

Hugs,

Elvira

Hi Barb,

Sorry for not writing lately but I have also been busy the past three weeks with out of town visitors.  Everyone is finally gone and now I will start preparing for my trip to Denmark and Norway with my son, daughter in law and her mother.  I'm a little scared of the trip as I have not flown such a distance without my husband being with me.  This is yet another thing that we have to overcome.  I read a little of your post to Elvira and see that you also have visitors keeping you busy.  That's wonderful!  Busy is good for us but when its all over is when it is difficult.  So like I told Elvira stay strong. We are stronger than we might think.  If you have to cry than cry it always makes me feel better afterwards.  Enjoy your time with your daughter and friends.  You are always in my thoughts.

Hugs, Marie