On 8/28/10 my son would have been 20 but he died just 2 wks after his 18th birthday on 9/13/08 of an accidental prescription drug overdose. He was such a sweet, funny, popular kid & the apple of my eye. It hurts every day. Could I recommend the book Love Lives On by Louis LaGrand (who also lost a child)? It is good to be in touch with other parents who have experienced the most horrific of losses, your child. Not only can we share ways to survive, but see that others are surviving as well. I studied a bit about the Kennedy family, who lost 4 children; Barbara Bush who lost her daughter Robin, Tony Dungy whose son hung himself right here in the area where I live (a drug related death) to try to discover, how did they not only survive but make contributions to this world? But it is very hard. I do not believe they ever really leave us. I do not know why your precious son had to leave this world when he did & I am so terribly sorry for this loss you are experiencing. How I wish I could take the pain away for you. In my darkest moments, & I have had many, I try to think what he would want, this boy who loved to make people laugh. And I know, hang on for now, honor his memory, be here to care for the others he loved for him. I belong to a group called Healing Hearts, a 'social' support group of parents who have lost children, and FAADA & NOPE, both groups to educate the public and especially the kids about the dangers of prescription drugs. It helps, but there are always moments of grief that overwhelm me. How can they not, our boys are worth our tears. My final belief is how we find each other. Do you ever wonder if our boys 'send' us to each other? How proud they would be to know we are taking care of each other? When another kid dies, I imagine Derek greets them (he LOVED his friends & they loved him, to Derek everyone is a friend) & first & foremost tells them not to worry about their Mom because the Moms are going to help each other. Your grief is still so fresh, but trust me, it won't be long until YOU are the one providing comfort to another. And know that when you do, you honor your son & he will be so proud of his very special Mom. Hold on tight, we are all here for you.
his death is still fresh. you never had the proper goodbye, even when you do feeling that way is normal. When you loose a child the grieving period is longer than any other time. I felt the same way when my daughter died 32 yrs ago. you will someday feel better but you will always grieve the loss of you son, it will be in different ways, no one undersatnds like a bereaved parent. Just do what you can to make it through each day.