Christain,
No matter how old they are, it's such a shock to our hearts. We can't believe, they would do this to the family.And in their mind they might be thinking, they will be better off without me. They are not thinking right.Did he show any signs of depression. Some times they are so depressed they don't even realize that there's something going on. You know that your brother loved you very much. He may have been in so much pain, that he thought that it was the only way out.He wasn't thinking about how much pain his family and friends would go thru.
My daughter's boyfriend took his own life at 20 years old. She was breaking up with him. He called her on her cell phone and said are you going to take my back? She told him when he got a job, they would talk. He said "This is all your fault, 5,4,3,2,1,bang." He shot himself while on the phone with my daughter.She jumped in her car, thank god a friend went with her. She found him dead. She could see him through the livingroom curtains. She fell to her knees screeming. That is when her friend call 911. She hasn't been the same since that day. She had been 15 months clean from drugs. That night she relasped, we had a hard time with her. The cops took her phone and his to view the messages, that he had been sending her. She was about ten miles away and she was at a friends house, where there was six other people. They all heard the gun shot. The police talked to my daughter and and saw all the text messages he had sent her that day. He had begged her to come over and talk. The police told my husband they thought he was planning a murder suicide. I had told my daughter that day not to go to his house because they had fought on the phone till 2:00 a.m. And for the first time in a while my daughter listened to me. Thank You God !!!
So I understand your pain, his death is something thst will take a long time to get through.Take one day at a time.I will pray for you, Vicki