Danny, I hadn't heard from you in a while and was concerned about you. I am glad that you are keeping up with family and friends but know that it is not the same as before. Nothing is the same. You are thoughtful to volunteer your time and make a difference.
I so wish all of us lived closer. We could hang out and cry together. Fortunately, we have this venue to communicate. Please know that you remain in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs are on the way.
Danny, I am so sorry for your loss. You are what we refer to as being in raw grief and unfortunately all you have described is normal. I am going on my 5th year and I hate every second I am here without him. My husband passed at the age of 59 from Lung cancer we were married 23 years and together for 26 years.
You have come to a wonderful place to be able to express your inner feelings without being judged. We are all grieving, we all understand your grief and there probably is not one person on here that has not experienced or expressed what you are saying now.
Grieving such as ours is not something we get over it is something we learn to get through. Stay strong, come here often even if it is to read posts. Hugs Jane P.