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Graham Baskerville liked Derick Grundyson's blog post Widowed at 43 on 11/1/15

Oct 3, 2019

Graham Baskerville left a comment for Derick Grundyson

"Hi Derick, I've just read your post which is a few years old now. I hope things are better & life is treating you well. I had some similar comments about moving on but (like you) found this somewhat insulting. How the heck do you move on…"

Oct 3, 2019

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43 year old widower

I recently lost my partner of 14 years to heart disease on 11/1/15.

Derick Grundyson's Blog

Widowed at 43 on 11/1/15

Posted on February 10, 2016 at 4:33pm 0 Comments 1 Like

My name is Derick, and I am here because I lost my partner of 15 years to a sudden heart attack in Puerto Rico. Family and friends have encouraged me to seek a support group to help cope with his loss, and I have always felt more comfortable writing down my thoughts and feelings than sharing them in a live setting.

A little bit about my partner and I:

We met in 2000 in St. Cloud, MN where he was an adjunct professor at the university there in communications. During our… Continue

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At 5:01am on October 3, 2019, Graham Baskerville said…: Hi Derick, I've just read your post which is a few years old now. I hope things are better & life is treating you well. I had some similar comments about moving on but (like you) found this somewhat insulting. How the heck do you move on & meet someone else when your heart is telling you that you've just lost the love of your life? I believe you only get one of those in a lifetime (if you are lucky) & some don't ever meet that one special person. In that sense I guess we're the lucky ones. I feel blessed to have been the partner of my lovely Ferenc & my only regret is that we didn't meet sooner & have more time together. Sending you hugs & wishing you strength to go forward with your grief. xx

At 12:12pm on November 25, 2017, David Heggi said…: Derick,

I'm relatively new here, and just now reading your story.

I hope after two years it's gotten a little easier for you - I'm just beginning my fall down that rabbit hole.

We ARE sometimes the only ones who hold the memory of our loved ones - who else could possibly know ?

People can be callous and indifferent when they would like to mean well, it nevertheless, hurts all the same - it still angers me when they diminish my loved one's memory by expecting me to get on with life, The feelings of isolation and abandonment are common and have to met and experienced in the healing process (or so they say). Sorry to be so textbook, Derick, I am new and passing along what I have learned here, as I want to reach out to help others like my self. Yes, I feel so all alone too.

I would like to know where you are on your journey, Derick. It would be very helpful for us in raw grief to read a success story - or maybe something close to that?

Wishing you well,

David H