Tuesday will be 3 weeks since my Dad pasted away and Iam struggling sooooooo bad. I dont know how anyone can say this will get easier with time. This could be the dely for the memorial which will be April 3, my dad wanted a big party and cookout so thats what were going to do maybe that will ease some of this I dont know. I painted his room last weekend with a yellow call Golden Treasure because thats what he is to me.
Many things in common here...just a few months difference. Mom will be gone one year tomorrow, and Dad had a cardiac arrest on July 23, 2009, and is now in the early stages of 3 kinds of dementia, AD, Vascular & Infarct all of which my siblings refuse to believe. They think I need to stop taking him to doctors! DUH! The grief journey has been so difficult, but they have made it impossible! Then, there is poor Dad stuck in the middle!
You're right talking helps...just as counseling, journaling, prayer and friends, but I think this group is the best! They have "been there and done that", and don't prescribe medication on the first visit! So, until 18 mos. has passed, I am sticking with my personal counselor, a baby aspirin a day for my heart, and this group! I hope you will, too!
You're so right ......grief is also like a tide...it does not go away, but instead tends to ebb and flow! That is a perfect description of my last year!
I'm here if you need me, and if you need my private email, I'm a good listener!
Eden, I lost my mother just over 3 months ago and right after that my dad went in to dementia. Its still rough. All the areas of my life have spiraled downward out of control as I have just been overwhelmed with the grief and all the tasks connected with closing up my parents' apartment and dealing with my dad's problems. I am going to counseling and thinking of trying hypnotherapy. This I know: time does NOT heal all wounds-it just gradually makes the wound easier to bear. My grief tends to ebb and flow like the tides of the ocean. Find someone you can talk to, but allow yourself to grieve. The stress of losing a parent is WAYYY up there not far behind losing a child or losing a spouse. We all grieve differently and there is no set time frame, so don't let anyone tell you there is. Best wishes....
Eden -- I know how you are feeling, I lost my father on November 16th 2009....It has been hard and it doesnt seem to be getting better, this is my first time losing someone this close to me. Some days I dont even want to face the world. I have a husband, kids and a job which all three of these are counting on me to continue living my life as if my dad was still here.
Everyday that I feel really depressed I just think of my dad up in heaven having a great time and being cancer free and pain free, I am not saying that it lifts my pain of missing him but it helps me get thru my day a little better.
I agree with Karen, you may need to go to a grief session, I am thinking about doing that, but I have hesitation because I am not one to talk in front of a group of people and I am sure am not the type of person to cry infront of strangers.
Hang in there and if you need to talk you can email me at email@example.com