Dear Jennifer ...  I am so sorry you are going through such a rough time. You have come to a very good forum were everyone here understands what you are feeling and it's a place we can air out our feelings without judgment. 

My husband passed away April 27,2011 (we weren't able have children)he was my rock, I felt safe and secure with him, we were best friends and lovers and I too still miss him a great deal.  Grief of a spouse is far more different than other losses such as parents, relatives or even friends.  None of us have been down this road before and it's not an easy road to go down, but please don't give up hon.  I have been where you are (many on here have) and feel 'what's the point of going on when this hurt never leaves my heart), but each day we make it through makes us stronger whether we realize it or not and life will get more tolerable.  Each person grieves differently and you are in the midst of your grief.  I am poking around trying to find out where I fit in as well.

If you are having some very bad times please email me if you are comfortable with that.  Maday1@shaw.ca  and please continue to post on this forum as it's basically saved my life thanks to Steve who started this forum and the wonderful members (angels) who post.

Big hug because you need it (you are not alone)

Marsha