Steve Cain
  • 59, Male
  • Aurora, IL
  • United States

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Latest Conversations

Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"My dear Chuck ...  I was in tears when I read your post and know how difficult it is for you to go through your anniversary.  Ernie's is coming up April 27th.  I wish I was there to give you a huge hug big brother. Love you &…"
Mary. Jane commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Ok part 2 for STEVE. Honestly, there IS a point to this, STEVE..but I am going to give a condensed version as telling it last night threw me into a huge is really too soon for me to b writing this, but WE CANNOT BLAME OURSELFS for…"
Mary. Jane commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"STEVE I have so much more to say, but I cannot do it tonight. Please remember, YOU DID NOTHING WRONG and IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT HE DIED. Bob died of a combination of lung, brain and stomach cancer, but he had a bicycle accident around 2010' when…"
Steve commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Mary Jane, Mark's illness was a neurological disorder very similar Parkinson's and so his doctors treated him with the same and similar meds, all of which were very strong and powerful pain killers and a mix of other drugs to try and…"
Mary. Jane commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"STEVE...was Marks death unexpected? I don,t understand why they called the police when u called the ambulance..oh, wait, I just "got it". Bob died at home too...but hospice told me NOT to call an ambulance, but to call THEM when he…"
Harold McKinstry commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Chuck  Nice Letter to Larry, you said what a lot of feels but have a hard time putting into words. Diane knew the way to look through my different faces for different situations and see the real me also. My Sister is a going through a Divorce,…"
Trina Mamoon commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear Chuck, I just read your post on the 2nd anniversary of Larry's passing, and I can't stop the tears from flowing. Your letter to Larry voices so many of the things that I would tell Joseph if I were writing to him--how much I miss him…"
Sara Murphy commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Chuck......thinking of you on this sad anniversary.  That was a beautifully written letter to Larry.  I wish I could take the pain away.  Know I'm giving you a cyber hug. Love, Sara"
Mary. Jane commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"For Rolland, Sara and Marsha, thank you...but for Steve and Charles, I don,t know what to say..only that I wish I could wrap my arms around you, and let you both cry on my shoulders, and take away some of your painful agony."
Sheri Dettman commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Apologies if this posts twice. I was also afraid for my two kitties, that I wouldn't be able to take care of them after Bill died. After all, I couldn't save him, so what made me think I could take care of the cats? Of course, they are…"
Sheri Dettman commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"I haven't been here in a while but I still think of all of you. I'm coming up on 8 months since Bill died and all of your comments ring true. I was very scared in the beginning of being alone at night. That has gone away and I set my…"
Charles E. Nelson commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"  I’m here more than I am not…   Dear Larry,               Tomorrow it will be two years since you disappeared. Two years ago I too disappeared. I don’t know to…"
Charles E. Nelson commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Part 2 I’m sorry I didn’t do more to make you see the doctor when it all started – I’m sorry I wasn’t more there. I was frightened right from the first day you asked me to look at the sore on your ear, as if I knew it…"
Sara Murphy commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Mary Jane......Yes, fear is normal but knowing that doesn't make it easier.  When we lost our spouses, we lost a huge part of ourselves, we lost our support system, we lost the one person on the planet that we knew would always be…"
Steve commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"I too felt fear, there were several layers of fear.  Mark passed away at home and having to answer all the questions that the paramedics hit me with, then the local police arrived and I had to answer all the same questions over, several…"
Marsha H commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Rolland ...  I did feel the same as you did and if I hadn't been in sheer shock when Ernie was in hospice and known he was so close to death I would have rather gone with him and that hasn't changed one bit for me, but here I am and…"

Profile Information

Just a quick note to thank you all for supporting each other. When I started this I would have NEVER thought this group would grow this big and have the amount of activity that it does. It's great to see you all supporting and helping each other. With 3 jobs it is hard to spend as much time as I'd like but it's good to know I don't have to spend a lot of time here administering things. Just remember I'm around if you need me. When something gets posted I do get an email and I will respond as soon as I get that. Thank you all for taking care of each other and remembering your loved ones here.

Comment Wall (104 comments)

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At 11:08am on June 18, 2015, Cynthia Murphy said…

It has been a while since I have been here. My husband died 19 months ago after 17years of suffering from diabetes related problems. I didn't think I would ever get better but I have. Eight months into a horrible grief a friend called and asked me to come over, her brother was there. I dated her brother in high school. He had lost one of his sons in 2001 and grieving as much as I was. We've had so many discussions about what we have been through and where we are now.. We are dating now and loving life again. We still talk about our loved ones we lost but we remember with smiles and happy memories. I don't know what the future holds for me but I have to trust that God is leading me in the direction that was meant to be for the second half of my life.

At 2:19pm on September 1, 2014, Karen W said…

Joyce, welcome to the site.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  I lost my husband Ed almost 9 months ago and I have found myself back at this site often looking for comfort, encouragement, understanding, or just to vent my feelings.  Everyone here has been where you and I are and understands what we are going through.   I wish you strength for each new day. 

At 10:45am on September 1, 2014, Joyce M said…

I too am new to this site...and am not sure how to post a comment...I have read so many comments by others and have found some small measure of comfort knowing that what I am going thru is so normal...I lost my husband just 3 weeks ago and every day is so hard right now....

At 9:44am on May 26, 2013, Jan said…
How do I talk to people on this site? I posted and did a blog and no one responded. Maybe I didn't do it correctly.
At 9:02pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
I just realized I posted
I have read others post and it seems no matter whether the loss of our loved one is recent or years ago What I am feeling is what others have posted
I feel a large piece of my heart died when he did I feel like I have to be another person at work and then go home to our home we shared for 45 years and feel so alone I just crawl in bed and zone out to movies or sleep When I think about how much I miss him and being there when he took his last breath it's like I have to put my feelings away because its too hard to deal with them. I get mad then sad and cry I just want to go to sleep and wake up and he is back home with me. The question I have is I feel bad when other family members call with problems they are having or if they are sick. I feel like I can't handle it or be sympathetic and say the wrong thing to them. I really don't want to talk to others I feel bad I can't listen to there problems Does anyone else feel this way. I have always been the strong one helped others and was able to fix my problems. This grieving I can't fix me. I know everyone says it takes time but this is the worst thing to go thru and I don't feel I will ever be me again. I married Mike when I was 18. Moved from my patents house to be Mikes wife then became a mother and now 45 yrs later alone. I was always a wife and a mother never a me I don't know how to be me. Mike and I were friends too and did everything together I really don't have friends Sorry my post is so long. Mikes birthday is coming up then Xmas. Thanks for listening
At 8:40pm on December 7, 2012, Babs said…
Hi. I am new here how do I post a question My husband of 45 years passed away 10 months ago tonight I don't feel it will ever be better I miss so much. GOD BLESS EVERYONE
At 2:35am on September 13, 2012, Marilyn kroge said…
I am facing the 1st anniversary of the loss of my beloved Jim and I still can't accept that I am alone for the first time since I was 18 years old, almost 50 years with the same man and my only love. I wake in the night to sounds that I realize are coming from my very soul. I find myself calling out to him, begging him to please come back to me, that I can't go on without him and I can't stop the tears that won't stop and I don't want to stop the pain I feel because that would make it real, it would mean that I finally know that I will never feel his arms around me, that I'll never kiss him goodbye when he left each morning. This man I met for the first time and we knew that first meeting that love at first sight really happened and we were together from that moment until I kissed him and felt his last breath, warm and so amazing that I felt his breath as he closed his eyes and so quietly left me forever . I know how maudlin my words sound but I so need to finally tell someone of my pain. I'm not allowed to say any of this to my sons or anyone in my family. Their grief became anger and so this has been my life, alone and terribly hurt that no one wants to hear what I've said here where I feel safe sharing my deepest thoughts. Thank you......."m"
At 9:13pm on September 12, 2012, Margie Thrash said…

I am coming up on my second month without my rock (Scott) it is hard but I do have good friends that check up on me every night if I dont contact them so I am fortunate that way.  Had to already go thru his birthday without him was very hard to do.  Then we always did a 100 mile horse ride week of labor day did it this year by myself with a few friends and was hard but I did it.  Not a day goes by I dont cry.  One of his last text to me was please dont get depressed like I am right now (he had 3 months to live from diagnosis made it 3 1/2).  So I try to think of that text everytime it gets too bad and I go outside or work around the house and listen to alot of music.

At 2:21am on January 10, 2012, Rowe said…

Welcome to all new members. I Lost my first husband 31 yrs ago at the age of 38. Remaried 6 yrs later and lost my Late husband after 10 yrs. He has been gone for 15 years. I am living proof that after the grief, Life will go on.  Not at first, but about 5 yrs later you will be living again.. even though you thought it would never happen. I Recommend that you do not try to avoid the grief.. you have to deal with it because if you dont it will be waiting for you to come back. I am here for you if you need to vent, or just want someone to give you an ear.

At 5:40am on December 15, 2011, dawn m long said…

hi steve only a few more days till christmas .. Im here for ya

 luv dawn


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