Hi Yelena!  I went to see Timmy's grave today.  It was exhausting emotionally. 

Hi!

Yelena thanks for writing. I cannot believe it has been so long for you and yo are still on this site. but I understand the loneliness when our child is gone. it is a part of us that never matures never blosoms... but it has they were blossoming untill this happened to them but it also happened to our soul. there is so much sadness and loss... thanks carrie L

Hi Yelena I am carrie I write on here to just share the loss. the loss is so powerful it is consuming... your mind can get distracted only to go to the loss sometimes it is terribly sad and sometimes your mind can go to something else. I do cry a lot when i am on here but perhaps sharing with others is some kind of therapy and the crying is somehow helpful. sometimes i feel like a fool talking to strangers but we don't feel like strangers we feel like an group trying to cope with the most horrible thing anyone can go through. you know cancer is bad and i shouldn't talk about that but i haven't experienced it. but this is gutwrenching and permanent. can't be changed. only us who are experiencing it hav eany idea of how it even feels... love to you and your beautiful child carrie L