Ali - I am in the same situation. I miss my Mom so much - I just want to talk to her even for a minute and I can't. I don't have anyone else to talk to like we did. Every time I visited, when I left, she would stand outside to watch me drive off, even in the dark or if it was cold. She wouldn't go in until she could see my car turn the bend in the distance. It is so hard and my husband thinks I am grieving too long. She died Dec 3. Please know you are not alone. You sound like a lovely person. I understand the pain of not having someone else in your life at that close level who loves you unconditionally. I really do. It is in my mind all day. I can't pick up the phone to call her. She called me Little One and I always knew she would be there and everything would be okay. She had a way of making you feel safe and totally loved. Bless you and know you will find joy and peace again. I truly believe that. Cheryl