June 2010 Blog Posts (66)

Twenty Seven Weeks!

It's Twenty Seven Weeks

To realize that time spend with you was so dear. When you are no longer here. I cling to memories, that bring you near. If only I could touch you again, without bringing back the pain. Feeling your presence that you are not really that far away. One day would us bring back the aura and magic of being again together. I know you are just a whisper away, just wish could see and feel you.

Added by Hurting on June 30, 2010 at 3:39pm — No Comments

Remembering Eric

I lost my son April 7, 2010 to an apartment fire. I've tried the group grief counseling offered by our local Hospice Group and found it to be an encouragement to cry rather than a means to learn to cope with the loss and continue to be a productive human.

I just keep thinking that Eric was supposed to take care of me when I passed - could he have handled the loss better than I am?

Added by Ellen Blair on June 30, 2010 at 3:30pm — No Comments

When memorial donations are not acknowledged

Memorial donations are a way to honor the memory of the deceased. Sometimes, the family of the deceased chooses the organizations and they’re noted in the obituary or funeral announcement. Individuals also choose organizations themselves; most often ones they think might be meaningful to the bereaved family.

Memorial donations are usually acknowledged. Sometimes with a note and short message of appreciation; other times, the bereaved might use the note as a cathartic expression,…

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Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on June 29, 2010 at 1:30pm — No Comments

Loss of a Child

I have lost two sons and the only ones I had. One was 6 years old when he died in 1961 and the other was 49 when he died last September, 2009. I really have never gotten over the loss of my first one, but find my grief managable. However losing my second son has torn my heart out. He did leave me a beautiful granddaughter and she has given me two beautiful great granddaughters. When I am alone the emptiness washes over me and I get very tearful. I know from experience the first year is the… Continue

Added by Miriam Allen on June 29, 2010 at 9:48am — 1 Comment

Grief: The Pick Up Sticks Theory

In this posting, it is my pleasure to introduce to you the first LegacyConnect Video Blog. Going forward, I will be alternating videos and written blogs; each video will be a quick 3-minute 'coping with grief' tip.

That said, this video is little lengthier at approximately six minutes, but I wanted to take the time to explain my own theory on how I believe the grief journey works. This theory compares life and the effects of grief to the age-old game of "Pick Up… Continue

Added by Ellen Gerst on June 29, 2010 at 7:30am — 5 Comments

About Marty and Tony,my sons in Heaven.

My oldest son Marty died in1986 and my youngest ,Tony was killed in 1997.I pray everyday for the strength God has blessed me with to keep going on.I never imagined I could if I lost a child.But now I have .I have to live everyday knowing I will never see them ,hug them,kiss them,or talk to them daily about their interests or plans,dreams.God help all of us who live in an empty world that can never be whole again.How I miss and love you,my sons,so intensely.You are in my heart.

Added by Linda on June 29, 2010 at 1:16am — No Comments

Suffering is Optional

Grieving is a healing process, and each person's process is unique. The way to move through grieving is to allow yourself to cry all of your tears. This is a time to be especially gentle, kind, and tender with yourself. Allowing yourself to grieve is self-honoring.

If, however, you are suffering with feelings of guilt, regret and remorse, this is unnecessary suffering. These feelings are most often due to misinterpretations and ill-founded beliefs.

As an example, I was… Continue

Added by Irene Kendig on June 27, 2010 at 2:59pm — No Comments

Alleviating Unnecessary Suffering

My dog Ringo died after being hit by a car when I was fifteen. As I ran to his side, he acknowledged my presence with one last wag of his tail. I was devastated. I blamed myself for his death. I also blamed my mom, who was at work. I believed that, if she'd been home, this never would have happened. I thought Ringo shouldn't have died when he did.

We are spiritual beings having a human experience rather than humans with spirits. This is no small distinction. The opposite of death is… Continue

Added by Irene Kendig on June 26, 2010 at 7:00am — No Comments

Im still alive...

We just passed the one year ANGELVERSARY of Joeys passing *sigh*, Im still alive, It has passed so fast, it seems like yesterday but then when I think of the last time I saw him when he was leaving that day it seems like a million years ago...I miss him so much : ' (

I had… Continue

Added by Tami on June 25, 2010 at 4:12am — 15 Comments

The First Anniversary Without My Husband

I haven't made any posts in quite a while. I have been on a roller coaster ride that never ends since January 9, 2010 when my husband was taken from me by that horrible disease lung cancer. Monday, June 28, 2010 would have been our thirteenth wedding anniversary. But there is no anniversary, because there is no longer a marriage. It ended on January 9, 2010. "Til death do us part" I think are the vows we took. I have been trying to find another life since then. Mainly I have been reflecting on… Continue

Added by Shelia Painter on June 24, 2010 at 9:26am — No Comments

How to write thank you notes after a death

A recently bereaved sister was in a dilemma. Her brother’s friends and colleagues sent cards, flowers and gifts after his death and she wanted to acknowledge the caring gestures. But she knew few of the individuals and puzzled over how to proceed.

It is very thoughtful to thank individuals for their kindness following a loss. Notes are very personal and what you say depends on how you feel about writing the notes. Some individuals create a template and use the same format for all…

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Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on June 24, 2010 at 9:00am — No Comments

MISSING MY MOMMY MY BEST FRIEND

MY MOM WAS MY BEST FRIEND SHE WOULD CALL ME AT LEAST 5 TIMES A DAY, NOW MY PHONE DONT RING ANYMORE! MY MOM PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY AT THE AGE OF 52, SHE WAS IN HER BED NEXT TO MY DAD, WHO FOUND HER MAY 17, 2010 AT 3AM. I WAS JUST LAYING DOWM IN BED BECAUSE I WORK NIGHTS WHEN I GOT THE PHONE CALL MY YOUNGER BROTHER SCREAMING TELLING ME TO COME TO MOMS HOUSE. HE JUST SAID SOMETHINGS WRONG WITH MOM GET HERE NOW. I WAS SO SCARED SHAKING CRYING DRIVING TO MY MOMS HOUSE. WHEN I GOT TO THE CORNER I SEEN… Continue

Added by MARY on June 24, 2010 at 5:26am — 1 Comment

My Journey Has Just Begun!

Don't think of me as gone away-

My journey's just begun,

life holds so many facets-

this earth is only one. . .

Just think of me as resting

from the sorrows and the tears

in a place of warmth and comfort

where there are no days and years.

Think how I must be wishing

that we could know today

how nothing but our sadness

can really pass away.

And think of me as living

in the hearts of those I touched. . .

for nothing loved is… Continue

Added by Hurting on June 23, 2010 at 9:04am — No Comments

When I’m Gone! ........................From Hari

When I come to the end of my journey

and I travel my last weary mile.

Just forget if you can that I ever frowned

and remember only the smile.

Forget unkind words I have spoken;

remember some good I have done.

Forget that I ever had heartache

and remember I've had loads of fun.

Forget that I've stumbled and blundered

and sometimes fell by the way.

Remember that I have fought some hard battles,

and won, ere the close of the… Continue

Added by Hurting on June 23, 2010 at 8:56am — No Comments

My Heart Is Hurting!

Today evening it is going to be six months. I am up since 4 a.m. wondering if there is anything I can do to turn the clock six months back. I would just stay home with you not leaving you alone for a moment. I would do everything in my power to keep you. Today I won't hold you back because you have a path to follow. You follow your destiny and I will hurt because that is mine destiny. Families are useless because when you really need them they are never there. Neither one of your brother or… Continue

Added by Hurting on June 23, 2010 at 7:50am — 1 Comment

Father's Day Without My Father

I spent fathers day without my father for the second year. He passed on in March of 2008. There continues to be emptyness in my heart when I see his pictures, but know that he is no longer around on this earth. His smile was one of a kind. You could see the day brighten whenever he smiled, which was often. Miguel Silva Lopez was his name. If you had the opportunity to meet him, you would always remember him. His work ethic was at the highest standard. He always did the best he could with what… Continue

Added by Hector Mike Lopez on June 21, 2010 at 11:03pm — No Comments

Need to find support group

I lost my fiance,Bob, to a one car accident on May 30,2010.

I live far away from my family and friends,have no support network here at all. Bob's family have basically shut me out and have told me to "move on with my life". I am in such pain over not only his loss, but his family shunning me and treating me like an outsider now. If anybody can offer advice or insight,it will be welcomed...I know there must be others here that have experienced what I am going thru and I can really use some… Continue

Added by marianne nicholas on June 21, 2010 at 8:56pm — No Comments

How do you stop the pain

It has been a year that I lost my youngest sister in my family the pain is still here as if it was yesterday we were very close she lived a block away from me I catch myself walking to her house and then realize she is no longer there her birthday is coming up real soon we usually have a cook out what am I going to do I don't like this kind of pain it won't go away God it hurts it still hurts so bad tell me how to deal with this cause I don't know how to much pain in my family

Added by Joanne on June 21, 2010 at 4:45pm — No Comments

We were so happy.............

A few years ago on a day when our family was together, my 3 daughters and I discussed how everyone in the family seemed to be doing what they wished, & were where they wanted to be. My youngest daughter was married to a man she loved who was retired from an airline and did for her most anything and everything she wished. They did not have children and were free to travel as they pleased. They owned a home in California but were living in southern France, traveling at will with airline… Continue

Added by Shirley Gutierrez on June 21, 2010 at 3:30pm — 6 Comments

Path of Pain

It was many years ago when my little daughter died in my arms in an ambulance due to an accident. I wondered how I could face tomorrow. How would I face my life with this pain. I learned to take one day at a time and not try to take on my entire future. Somedays I had to just make it one hour at a time. My faith walked me through that journey. Then three years later, I was back in the emergency room and my husband was doa from another auto accident. A drunk driver hit him head on. I didn't… Continue

Added by sharon kennedy on June 21, 2010 at 1:40am — No Comments