The other day the lawyer that is handling Gary's probate said something out of the blue that made me feel a lot better and maybe a bit sadder in a way. I told him that I hadn't realized how quickly I had become one of those women that didn't know much about our combined finances or where certain records were stored. I told him that I had been divorced for 15 years before Gary and I were married and I didn't know how to take care of this stuff again. He looked at me calmly and he said, "You… Continue

Today is the 13th of March. Which means that there is a St. Patty's Day parade going on where we use to live. That would make me lonely enough, just knowing that I'm here not there. Of course if Gary was alive we might be there. We traveled the three hours back and forth quite often and he knows I'm a sucker for a good parade. But by the same token, my daughters are working today and my son wouldn't care to go to a parade and Gary really couldn't walk far, so I might not have gone anyway. I… Continue

Today was the first time I've had to go to the grocery store without Gary or without buying the things that he liked. I realized while I was there that I didn't even know what I liked to eat without thinking of his dietary needs and foods he liked first. It was a fairly horrible experience. I cried while I was there. I tried to hide it and outside of appearing a bit distressed I don't think anyone actually noticed. I looked at a lot of things that I would have normally bought, but now that I… Continue

Today we got back home after being gone for the last four days for Gary's memorial service in Omaha. The service was quite nice. Lots of people showed up (I forgot to get a guest book, darn it) and lots of folks had very nice things to say about Gary. They told stories, mostly about his generosity, which was legendary, I believe, and they told jokes that he told them. He was always so much fun, and so funny. He could ignite a room with his wit and he was always the smart one in the bunch,… Continue