I lost my husband 5 weeks ago.  I just found this site and have been reading some of your posts.  My heart goes out to all of you.  My husband was diagnosed with cancer and the doctors said he probably had about 18 months to live.  That was almost 5 years ago.  I feel so blessed that we had so much more time than predicted.  He was so positive and carried on his life as if nothing was wrong.  I think during those 5 years I was mentally preparing for the time when I would be alone.  The last…