It's been 1 month today since my son, Landyn, passed away. At just 16 months old, I didn't have him very long at all, but it feels I've had him my entire life and I should have him the rest of my life. I'm feeling pretty numb today and that's better than the feeling I normally have since he passed. I still find it too painful to go over the events of the day I lost him. Maybe I am still in denial. I find myself sitting in the chair and I tell myself if I think harder enough about him walking around the corner then he will. I set myself up for such a disappoint and heartbreak. Heartbroken is the only way to describe my life now. I have my 4 year old daughter, Madilynn, that depends on me everyday. I feel I will never be as good of a parent as I used to be. How am I surviving? Every morning I look forward to the day by thinking "This may be the day God comes and takes me to home to see my sweet Landyn!" I am so lost.