My husband died suddenly and unexpectedly 4 months ago while we were on vacation, in a drowning accident.
I have 3 teenage boys, and thye really have been my strentgh and support. I also come from a big family, and have lived very close , spending lots of time together with the cousins and sisters over the years. It hasn't always been harmony, but i have always had my husband to come home to, talk about things and learned to let the small differences go. At first everyone was very supportive, smothering , but i felt they were there for me and for the boys. Now, the pettiness is back, the senseless arguements and nitpicking, mean words amongst each other, i can stand it, i want to scream and say, haven't you learned anything?? I think they feel , poor thing, but soooooo glad it didn't happen to them! and life is business as usual now. it is so weird, they think i should be okay?!
why am i so sensitive? is it sensitive to want people to be kind to each other, why can that continue?
anyway , my father is elderly and I love him so very much, but it is so hard to be around the bickering between my sisters. I tried to let them know how hurtful it is, as sometimes it is directed to me to, yet they have always acted this way, and i don't know if they are capable of changing. I guess my question is, other than avaiding them ,which i still do want them to be part of my life, what can i do? the confrontation didn't work so i tried emailing, , now getting the cold shoulder.
i feel like i lost my husband , now i am losing my sisters, because i can't deal with the lack of compassion /kindness i need right now in my life.
any suggestions?
i know Jesus says forgive 7 x 70, and to turn the other check, but sometimes i feel this has given them years of approval for bad behavoir. they really don't lose too much sleep over it!

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Comment by Kim Hawkins on April 8, 2010 at 3:26pm
i saw your email about your posts. I sent you a response I am not sure how that works. But I looked up your name from the email under sheila. I am not sure how this rlog works but if you go up to the top of the page and click on Grief Support Forum you can them add posts that other members see and will write back on. I hope this helps. I am very sorry for your lose.

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