I am so not looking for July 24,this will be 1 year that my oldest son died with liver failure..I seems like yesterday that this happened ,feeling the depression setting in and holding back the tears not to upset the rest of the family is so hard i will cry at night when everyone is still sleeping or I will go outside at night and sit on the bench and look up at the stars and as myself Why??My family is great support but they don't understand that I would just like to be left alone at times.YES i don't go any where any & more spend alot of time in my son room where i moved in. They don't understand yes it been almost 1 year and they want me to move on easy to say they did not give birth to my son nor did they spend 36 years of his life with him, a mother will never get over the pain of losing a child!!!

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Comment by Janice on January 17, 2011 at 7:42am

Amelia, I'm so sorry about the lost of your son. I truly understand how you feel. My son Mark was murdered on March 30, 2009 he was 27yrs old and it still feels like it just happened yesterday. I cry a lot when I'm alone. People who haven't lost a child will never know our pain, like you said they didn't birth a child just to lose them later in life and suffer there after. For me most of the time the pain in unbearable, I feel like I can't catch my breath, sometimes I just want to lye down and die. I struggle through living on without my Mark constantly and believe me it's a true struggle...a parent should not have to witness the death of their children, this is truly the cruelest fate dealt to us all. Again Amelia I'm sorry about your baby and when you need to talk or a shoulder to cry on...well you can call on me anytime.  God bless and keep you safe.



Comment by Janet - Todd's Mom on December 26, 2010 at 5:54pm
Hi Amelia,  Just wanted you to know that I understand how you feel about the fact that your family wants you to "move on", as you said, they didn't give birth to your son nor spend 36 years of his life with him.  My son died from pneumonia because his doctor didn't diagnose him correctly, telling him he "wasn't that sick and didn't have the flu or pneumonia".  4 days later he was rushed to the hospital but it was too late.  He died 5 days later at age 38, a very young 38, kind, gentle, intelligent with a great sense of humor.  Although it's been 18 months, I will never be able to "move on", whatever that means.  The loss of a child, no matter what age, is the worst thing that can happen to anyone.  No one should ever ever tell us how we should feel or that we should "move on".  I'm getting by one day at a time, one minute at a time.  I wish you and all of us here peace, if that's possible.  Hugs, Janet
Comment by Debra on December 15, 2010 at 7:19pm

Hi, my name is Debbie. I read about your son and wanted to write to express condolences. When death separates family members, such great loss can result in deep sorrow. No doubt your family at this time is overwhelmed with great sadness. You need endurance and comfort that last long after those around you have returned to their normal routine. You may even find that it is especially difficult for you each year about the time that your son died. While it is true that a mother or father will never get over the pain of losing a child, I have some information that may bring you some comfort. I have found it helpful to search out what God himself says. By using the Bible as a reliable source of hope, many have been comforted. Jehovah out of underserved kindness has opened up for billions who have died the priceless opportunity to enjoy eternal life here on earth. He has extended the hope that we will see our dead loved ones again on a Paradise earth. Jesus said at John 5:28,29, "The hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out." So when this earth is made into a Paradise, we will have the prospect of enjoying life without end, free from all sickness, disease and trajedy. I know it's hard to imagine that, especially living in the times we do. You can find this promise at Psalms 37:9-11, 29 and Revelation 21:4). It will be into such a cleansed earth that Jehovah God through Jesus Christ will resurrect our dead loved ones. If your heart yearns to see your son, Johnny again, Jehovah's Witnesses will gladly assist you to learn how you can make this sure hope your very own. Why not contact them at a Kingdom Hall near you, or go to www.watchtower.org. I hope that these scriptures bring you comfort. Sincerely, Debbie

Comment by Tami on July 31, 2010 at 8:31pm

Oh Amelia I so understand your feelings, My sons year passing was on June 22.... I have always kept up a brave front for everyone that I know, they always say "You are so strong..." If they only knew! I too cry at night when the house is quiet and no body is around, I dont know why I feel that I have to hide my feelings but I do. Joey was my youngest, I have a daughter that is 28, he was just 18. His presence is so missed around the house, I have 2 of his friends still living here, they moved in about a year befroe Joeys accident, i still cant bring my self to go into his room, His one friend lives in it, It is still the same way that he put the furniture...I have every scrap of paper and everything he owned in boxes near my bedroom, I cant bare for anyone to touch his things. I wish that I wouldve moved into Joeys room and kept it the same, but his friend was already in there... I feel you and why you have to be in there. I have also made a garden in my front yard for him..On the 22nd of every month I light candles out there, it is so peaceful. I am so sorry for your loss. It dosent get easier, it just gets more tolerable. Life goes on weather we like it or not, people go on and we are kind of in limbo.... There is no pain greater then losing a child, NONE. I am here to talk if you need to. XO
Mom to
Joseph Anthony Scalise
11/02/90 06/22/09
Forever My Baby

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