Death is the great equalizer. Be you rich or poor; savvy or naïve; any religion; or any race, there is not a family that goes untouched by death and the subsequent grief that follows.
After a death of a loved one, a person is usually vulnerable and, consequently, open to considering new thoughts and ideas, as well as connecting with those he/she would not have previously come in contact. It is upon this great cross-section of new ideas, people, and opportunities that a foundation for a new life may be built.
I call it the “do-over.”
I believe after the loss of someone close, you may become braver – perhaps less fearful of the unknown. After all, something extremely bad happened, and you were able to withstand it.
Consider ….
~Maybe, you are stronger than you thought.
~Maybe,you can accomplish those things that you never believed you were able to before.
~Maybe, you don’t have to be afraid of what others will say or think about you.
~And just maybe, now that you are set free from life as you knew it, you can go on to create a different kind of life that will suit the "new you" to a tee!
If you are feeling stuck in your grief and don’t know how to move forward, reflect on the following poem.
Can’t ~ Don’t ~ Not Good Enough
Stuck inside a box
feeling restrained by other’s perceptions
Now ready to break free
Expand my wings and take flight
Bound no longer
Soaring high
Reaching for the sky
A mind unleashed with no boundaries
A spirit liberated to soar
Released from a cage with self imposed chains
I am ready to be me
************
It is not that you wanted it, but, nevertheless, you are the recipient of a chance for a "do-over." Your power lies in how you respond, so rather than bemoaning the fact that you have lost something, try believing that with every loss there are also great finds – and go grab every opportunity you can!
Ellen Gerst, a Life Coach who specializes in grief and relationships, is the author of several books on grief, including A Practical Guide To Widow/erhood, born out of Ellen's own experiences as a young widow; 101 Tips and Thoughts on Coping with Grief, an easy-to-read reference guide filled with suggestions for every day use on moving forward through the grief journey; and Love After Loss: Writing The Rest of Your Story. "Love After Loss" is a blueprint on how to use her successful method to redesign your life to include a new love connection after the loss of a partner. Join the conversation on Facebook for Love After Loss. Click for more information and to order grief related services and books.
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