Cody was my 21 year old Mommas boy. He had a heart of gold, he would have done anything for anyone. On the anniversay of his older brothers death Feb 13, 2011 Cody spent the day with me because he knew I always needed cheering up on that day.We had a wonderful day . We talked and he had a snowball fight with his little sister.We were going to the cemetary to put flowers on Matts grave and stopped to buy flowers. We were at a small Dollar Store and there was a line of people and one cashier. cody is standing in line and starts belting out Splish splash I was taking a bath and the cashier looked at him smiled and sand along about a saturday night! then the gentleman behind us sang the next line and Jessice and I were hiding our faces and laughing.When it was our turn the cashier told him it was refreshing to have someone like that in the store! We wet to the cemetary and walked around and talked some more. then on the way home he asked if I could take him to his friends house because it was his friends 21st birthday, since we had just had such an awsome day I said sure and I will pick you up in the morning. But that never happened. I dropped him off at 7pm and at 10:30 pm I recieved a call from Codys cell phone, when I answered it was a woman asking if I knew my son had been in an accident. I asked her a car accident and she said no a fall I will put the doctor on. The doctor very bluntly said he was goofing around and climbed to the top of a 30 foot tree and the branch broke with him. He fell 30 feet to the ground landing on his back.The kids he was with did CPR till the life squad arrived but the lifesquad lost his pulse and we couldnt get it back. I just remember screamin into the phone no dont say that No No No. He then put the nurse back on the phone to give me directions to the hospital. I did ask what time he fell and he said around 10 pm. Our electric went out at 10 pm and the electric company coudnt find anything wrong and it came back on at 11:30.I remember arriving at the hospital and seeing my baby just laying there lifeless. I hugged you and stroked your face like I was waiting for you to open your eyes. they finally had to ask me to leave because I didnt want to go and leave you behind.Cody was so full of life and always wanted to make people laugh. he was the jokester, the life of the party. He loved his family and friends with everything he had. I will miss that smile, I will miss that hug and I love you Mommy. So I lost both of my sons on Feb.13 twenty three years apart and both experiences have been so different. I know I made it through the first one but I had 3 little ones to cling to. I know my other children need me now even if they are older and I will go on for them but I have lost a big piece of my heart that I will never get back! I love you Cody and Matt!

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Comment by Alicia Rodriguez on June 14, 2011 at 9:50pm
Comment by Gina Phillips, Cody's Mom on April 20, 2011 at 4:06pm
Yes Shannon Cody was a twin. His twin brother Jamey is having a real hard time with it since they were so close. Jamey's baby son Matthew was born 2 weeks after Cody's death. It was so bittersweet. We call Matthew our little ray of sunshine!!!!!
Comment by shannon churchill on April 20, 2011 at 11:43am

Is Cody the twin?    I watched the video...such a wonderful trubute.    Your Cody so reminds me of my Tommy..   a larger than life personality.  So sorry there are no words..  Broken hearts are here for you.  


Comment by Susan - Donny's Mom on April 19, 2011 at 1:31pm

Oh my gosh....I cannot imageine what you are going heart breaks for you!!!  Prayers and warm thoughts coming your way...

This website has wonderful people that all help each other thru dark days.....

Hugs to you

Susan   Donny's Mom Forever

Comment by Tami on April 19, 2011 at 1:04pm
Oh Gina, this just breaks my heart. Know that we are all here to help you and support you through this, you let it out any time, I am sending you virtual hugs and saying a prayer for you and your family.
Comment by Terri - Autumn's Mom on April 11, 2011 at 9:11am

Wow Gina, what a lot for one person to have to deal with in a lifetime.

It really does help to have a loving and supportive family.  When my mom lost my brother 29 years ago, she had no one to lean on but my dad and my sister and myself.  I think with losing Autumn, she is also now mourning for my brother too. 

I agree with you, there is a piece of my heart missing that will never be filled by anyone else.  I love my sons and I'll always be there for them, but the loss of my daughter has changed who I am, life will NEVER be the same without her.

Comment by Gina Phillips, Cody's Mom on April 11, 2011 at 8:59am

Thank you Terri, it has only been 8 weeks since Cody left us and it still seems like he will come driving up and walking in.the experiences of the 2 different children has been so different. But with my first son in1988, his father could not bear the pain,. The accident happened at my parents house so he started blaming my father so in 1992 my husband shot my father and killed himself also. so I guess thos 4 years was just trying to deal with my husbands depression and 3 small children I really didnt have time to dwell on things to much. But this time with such a loving and supporitive husband and children it has really hit hard and maybe I am grieving for both of them now.but I sure have learned to never judge anyone till you walk in their shoes!!! My heart just feels so empty and I know I have the other children and I will always be there for them but life will never be the same with out my

cody! thanks for listening and hugs back to you

Comment by Terri - Autumn's Mom on April 11, 2011 at 8:12am


I just read your blog post.  I can't imagine going through the pain of losing a child twice.  My heart goes out to you. 

I'm so happy for you that Cody was able to spend the day with you and you have happy memories from that day.

I feel bad for the way you were told, if you're like me, that day is embedded in your memory.

It's been 18 weeks since I lost my daughter, Autumn and my head just feels like it's full of cotton most days.  It's still very unreal and out of nowhere it will hit me.

Just know you have all of us here to talk to.  I found this site within a couple of weeks and it's been very helpful to me.  I'm finding my immediate family will talk about Autumn, not necessarily how I feel about it, which I'm glad they're not acting like she's never existed.  My friends look uncomfortable when I bring up her name and usually change the subject.  I haven't cried to anyone, I do that alone and a lot.  I miss her so much and only the people on here truly understand what that feels like.

I hope you're doing okay and I'm sending hugs your way!


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