Some weeks have passed now since Wendy left us. Each day seems the same, without purpose, without meaning. She was literally the center of my existence. Every action, every thought was about us, about her. Now that focus is gone, and only memories remain. I am lost without her.

  It know that I must find the "new" in my life. New challenges, new reasons to get up each day. It has been said they we all need three things. They are: something to do, something to look forward to and someone to love. I will always love Wendy with every fiber of my being. The "something to do" part is taken care of too, since I'm back to work.  But the "something to look forward to" somehow eludes me. We had so many plans together, and they seem meaningless without her. But I live on, and I know there is a reason for that. Maybe finding the "new" turns out to be my "something to look forward to".

 I'll keep getting up every day, and make sure to look out for others. Maybe I'll find what I need even if I don't know what it is right now.

 For now I'm concentrating on the wonderful days Wendy and I had together. Her spirit lives on and I carry it with me for ever.


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