how do I get past this?????

so I got a phone call on tuesday 8/31 from the sheriff's office to come to my father's residence as soon as possible... I had been expecting this call for a while now but when it actually happened I am still left with the hurt and confusion as to "WHY?" and to think he did it and no body heard anything at all and he laid there dead in his home for 10-14 days before an old lady across the street called in a welfare check on her neighbor b/c he had not put his trash out in 2 weeks.... and to think what the Deputy that responded had to see... the first night after I found out even with medication I was still unable to sleep, the next night was alittle better, and the next even better, but then last night I was trying to go to sleep and everytime I closed my eyes I saw images...and I know it was just my mind playing tricks because I did not have to see him to ID him, law enforcement did that for me, but I still saw things and it took forever to fall asleep. Now tonight is my husbands first night back to work since this all started and I will be all alone with my thoughts, worries me alittle....

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Comment by Tonya on September 30, 2010 at 5:22pm: Some days you'll laugh about something they said or did and the next day you'll here a song that reminds you of old times as a family. I understand, I was really close to my dad and sometimes the pain is unbearable, I just try to live right and help other people so that maybe god will let me see them again when it's my time, take care.