My partner, Lloyd, passed away 4 weeks ago.
He woke as usual at 4am to wash dishes, pack his lunch and SMOKE! He came back into the bedroom sweating, vomiting and with pains in his chest, arm and back. Phoned for an ambulance which never arrived. Got him into the car eventually and got him to hospital. They treated him in casualty for chest pains and admitted him to the cardiac unit. The unit manager sent me home to collect clean clothes. Barely at home I received a call advising that he had taken a turn, got back to the hospital in 10 mins where they were apply shock to his chest. He died of a massive heart attack aged 49. The cardiologist, four ICU sisters and other specialists could not save him.
It seems so senseless loosing a partner who for me was everything, the void he has left is unfathomable, the dreams we had, the special moments we shared, the trove of memories ,the simple pleasures we shared all gone in the blink of an eye.
The lonliness hurts.....