Deborah diggs's Comments

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At 10:05pm on August 13, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Thank you deborah, I do really appreciate it. Hugs to you.Hugs are good.
At 8:04am on August 10, 2010, TINA GREER said…
Thank you Debbie for you comment. I did send you an e-mail.
At 11:37am on August 8, 2010, Kim said…
I wish there was something I could say or do to make us all feel better, but there isn't. I wake up everyday (sometimes I wish I didn't) and feel like I just exist. I am not living. I don't know how to live anymore. There is such an emptyness inside me. I felt the same way about dieing. I was too scared I wouldn't be with my husband for all eternity and I could never take that chance. I do believe in God and even though I am not very religious person I have been reading the bible and I must say it does help a little. Also knowing I can talk to people on this site and they truley understand what I am going through and how I feel gets me through the day.
At 12:13am on August 8, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Thank you deborah for the hugs. Hugs are good
At 5:00pm on August 7, 2010, Arlene said…
Hello
I lost my husband unexpectedly on June 1, 2010 from a
cerebral hemorage.
When you said (on another post): that I thought about ending it all in the first few weeks of grief,but I didnt feel that i had any guarantees tht we would be together for eternity--
I almost flipped ! Because that is EXACTLY how I feel !
All I do is cry and nobody really understands......
At 10:59pm on August 4, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Debbie, LOL. You bet hugs are good. Thank you for your kind thoughts and giving encouragement. That, among all the rest of those things we now must find again. I have always been the pessimist. Without LouAnn here with me, I pretty much suck alone, bigtime. I have no one to impress, lol, ya know what I mean ? I wish the very best for you on your "new journey" and we are all here to help and understand and share. No matter, the good and the bad. Hugs to you. Hugs are good.
At 10:59pm on August 4, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Debbie, LOL. You bet hugs are good. Thank you for your kind thoughts and giving encouragement. That, among all the rest of those things we now must find again. I have always been the pessimist. Without LouAnn here with me, I pretty much suck alone, bigtime. I have no one to impress, lol, ya know what I mean ? I wish the very best for you on your "new journey" and we are all here to help and understand and share. No matter, the good and the bad. Hugs to you. Hugs are good.
At 7:27pm on August 4, 2010, Leia Wright said…
Deborah,
You have been very kind and I appreciate that. You are right. My sons, and their families, have been a great blessing! The first couple of months I called them many times, in the middle of the night, in tears! They were great! My oldest son especially always seemed to know exactly what to say to calm me. I am so glad we will all be together this weekend!
I have the cleaning down to just vacuuming. I am going to do that yet tonight. Then, DONE!! I'll be ready and waiting for the grandkids! I cannot wait to see them! Their parents too of course! They always tell me they are just an accessory! The kids are the main draw! LOL
I know doing the ashes is going to be difficult, but I have "talked" to Don about it and that has made this not quite so bad.
I hope you are doing well. I do think of you often, also. I talk to a lot of people, but I feel the people on here are the only ones that truly understand. Thank you for being there.
Leia
At 10:12am on August 4, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Deborah diggs, we accept typos. Actually we can read them LOL. No big deal. Your message about knocked me off of my chair. You have a great way with words and expressing yourself. I am proud of my "kissing" photo. My kids,everyone, can see our love. She was my pal. I loved posting "the cousin" story and sharing it. It seemed like the "right" thing to do. I do not believe for a minute that my life can go on. No one to hold, hold me,talk with and be around and to relate with. I have been put out to pasture for good. And that sucks, bigtime. Everything that is me is gone forever.All of my skills and experience and talents, will never see the light of day. I will send you an e-mail. My addy is randymanny77@embarqmail.com. A long one, huh? I wish the very best to you and I am sorry for your loss and the "new life" we are all in.Hugs to you.Hugs are good.
At 10:48pm on August 3, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Thank you Deborah. Things have finally tapered down Now I can catch up with myself. God knows why. I have no life anymore. All I can do is understand and share. And of course, hugs to you. Hugs are good.
At 3:05pm on August 2, 2010, Leia Wright said…
Deborah,
Thank you so much for your kind words. It sounds like we are in somewhat the same place. May and June were my "horrendous" months. Our 37th anniversary would have been May 12. June 14th was Don's birthday. This would have been his 60th. One thing I will be forever grateful for is that I threw him a surprise birthday party, at the nursing home, last year. I did not know what was going to happen, but I believe somehow God laid it upon my heart to do that.
Both our sons and their families were there. Almost every one of our/his friends were there and a ton of family! He was totally surprised and loved it! The next month, last July, his classmates from school hired a handicap van to transport us to his reunion. He was able to stay almost 3 hours! He had so much fun. They had put the word out that he was coming and they had the largest turnout ever for their reunions. I think those two things helped him make his decision to quit taking his medication. He had had the chance to see almost everyone he cared about.
Right now, I am going through a rough time about the ashes. I know we will spread them on Sunday as he wished. It will just be very difficult.
I understand what you are saying about the housework and I am trying that. A little at a time. Today my goal is to get the bathrooms done. I finally got the spare bedroom done! Then it's just vacuum and dust. I also need to get the dishes done, but that is a minor problem. I will do the best I can and the rest will be ok. My daughter-in-law, whom I love as if she was my own daughter, has told me to leave everything and she will do it when she gets here. I don't want to do that. This will be her vacation. I also want to do so much with the grandkids! I have all kinds of plans. Now to just get my "mind" to cooperate!
I truly appreciate your caring note to me when you also are hurting! That means a lot to me. I will keep you in my prayers also.
Keep in touch,
Leia
At 10:20pm on August 1, 2010, Suzanne said…
Dear Deborah,
I just wanted you to know that I will remember you in my prayers. I know how you feel because I feel it too and it is so unbearable to know that my husband is really gone. My heart is in so much pain, I read posts because I didn't want others to be so depressed from what I always say that I know in my heart I have no more joy, and I am just waiting for God to call me but somehow God is carrying me from one day to the next and my heart goes out to you and everyone for what you are going through. May somehow you have peace.
God bless,
Suzanne
At 11:23pm on July 31, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Thank you so much Deborah. it means a lot to me. I try to post to most of the people. I'm just good at it. I have no brain since LouAnn died suddenly. Hugs to you. Hugs are good.
At 2:02pm on July 31, 2010, Donna Chapman said…
Deborah, I just wanted to added my 2 cents worth. I just recently found this website and have share my thoughts also. It has been 4yrs. for me this coming Aug. 7. I have shared with the intent to help others. It is easier as time passes but don't stop talking either here or to friends and family near you. Don't give up keeping talking I'll listen. Donna toby.8733@yahoo.com
At 8:23am on July 30, 2010, Kim said…
Deborah,
I am sorry about your husband. My husband Jerry passed away June 1, 2010 from cancer and I am so lost without him. I don't have any close friends and this site does help me get my feelings out without being judged by anyone. People say in time we learn to cope with the pain, but so far I am not coping too well. I sit home everyday and cry my heart out. I can't get the thought out of my head that I will never hear my husbands voice, or feel his touch and it is driving me crazy with sadness. Anytime you need someone to talk to I will listen. If you want to email me thats fine to my email is ksob2401@hotmail.com
Take Care and hugs to you
At 8:15am on July 30, 2010, Virginia said…
Dear Deborah, please let me say i'm sorry,i truelly don't have a excuse for not responding to your post but i really do know how you feel about people not responding to your post, there has and still is many times i write and no one will respond i also tell myself i'm not comming back, yes it does hurt when you want to or need to hear from anyone, but for some reason this is the first place i come to when i get online i guess it is because you know you are not the only one feeling this way, sometime i get on and start reading and cry like a baby as hard as i try not to come here i do sometime several times a day. deborah i will try better, my personal e-mail is krazy 4 dolls@aol.com if you would like we can chat there or on the phone,god bless
At 6:37am on July 30, 2010, bc said…
Hi Deborah, I just joined this site a couple of weeks ago out of desperation. I lost my Brad Aug 5, 2009 very suddenly. I'm still new to the site, but I do know that there are many people hurting out there, many more than I ever imagined. I've just been reading and writing to some. It is a hard life that has been chosen for us and its not fair, but please stick with us. I haven't seen your posts yet, but if you like I'd like to be your friend and be there for you. My husband passed away very suddenly. He was 53 yrs old, drove out of our driveway and had sudden cardiac arrest 30 seconds later and was gone. It will be a year next week and the hurting and lonliness have not gone away, in fact I'm in clinical depression so I need some friends who understand also. Please email me at: bchamberlain@wi.rr.com or find me on Facebook, my name is Barb Chamberlain. Please get in touch with me even if you decide to leave this site, I want to help you and need someone to help me through this hell!
I'll look forward to hearing from you. Take care,
Barb
At 11:46pm on July 22, 2010, Randolph L. Schrader said…
Thank you deborah, I did leave for a while but I am back. I need this site and perhaps I can inspire here and there.It so lonely without our loved one. Life is so empty.I cant offer much but I can share and care because we all care.Hugs to you. Hugs are good.
At 9:48pm on July 13, 2010, Joyce F. said…
Hi Deborah,

It's good to hear from you, I just been so tired when I get home from work and haven't had time to get online, no I don't have no other way of dealing with Donald's passing, Sunday was the first time I went to a outing without Donald, even though it was at his twin sister house it has been incredibly hard for me to do. Since the last time I have talked with you, my middle daughter graduated from high school, this was a bittersweet day for her she wanted to go to the cemetery with her cap and gown to leave Donald's ticket which she kept for the graduation...WOW was that hard but we told funny stories and we laughed and cried it was beautiful. I skipped over the prom which Don and I had planned to have a gathering while she was gone to the prom...I still had a small gathering of course I cried all day leading up to the time for her to get prepared...I thought about that her dad will never give her away on her wedding day which he talked about when she was first born...Deborah not only do I hurt for myself but I hurt for them.

I still can't listen to the radio sometime.

Talk to you soon...lots of hugs for you Dear friend!!!!
At 9:54pm on July 8, 2010, deborah diggs said…
I cant stop crying tonight, nothing is fixing this pain, i miss my husband, I need him, I cant see how to live the rest of my life feeling like this. Every day since March 16 th, 2010, ther has beenn no Byron,,,and every day for the rest of my life there will be no Byron,,I cant stand this! Does it ever get better???

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