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At 6:49pm on September 3, 2011, Stewart said…

Hi tamarah,

Just loggin in to see what is happening and I have noticed that you have been very quiet recently, as have I and with time on my hands I thought it would be nice to catch up with you. you might not know but my friend here is a Jehovah's Witness she sure would love to hear from you if you would like to drop her a message she sure would welcome you.doreen2@live.co.uk She is very busy over here.


At 1:11pm on May 23, 2011, Stewart said…

Hi tamarah, nice to here from you again . I have been having terrible trouble with my internet connection as bt were updating there service and knocked me out of broadband. It has been a terrible time without it . It has struck me in a way that was unexpected . without my network i felt isolated and alone. but now that i have managed to get connected again all is well again . "WELL" as one can be i guess. so sorry for not getting back to you I do miss your thoughtfull and trully uplifting messages.  take care and hope that all is proggressing well for you . thoughts and wishes to you tamarha .

best wishes stewart..

At 4:00pm on May 17, 2011, Warren Washington said…

Well yes I am one of Jehovah's Witness and thank you for your condolences as well. It's okay to have a different views I was just trying to share with you the comfort I received from God's word the Bible not my own opinion.


Out of curiosity I was wondering why did you ask about my faith.  

At 11:10am on May 17, 2011, Chelle said…

Hi Miss Tamarah,


I send you my condolences. I can't imagine loosing my mom. Mine actually lost her own mother to brain cancer. She recovered fine, the doctors said "no stress" unfortunately she returned home to her husband. A stressful environment no doubt. And the cancer came back and took her away. My mom talks about her still, ( of course). We look forward to seeing her again. Do you also think you'll see your mom again?

 Take care 

At 6:18pm on May 16, 2011, Warren Washington said…

Hello how are you? My name is Warren. I would like to express my condolences to you. I lost my dad in 2002 and that pain was unbearable for me. I felt physically sick to my stomach but I was able to find comfort in God's word the Bible.


Death is such a hard pill to swallow I know from personal experiences. I would like to share with you what I found out about the dead and what happens to us when we die and hope for our dead love ones.The dead are shown to be “conscious of nothing at all” and the death state to be one of complete inactivity. (Ec 9:5, 10; Ps 146:4) Those dying are described as going into “the dust of death” (Ps 22:15), becoming “impotent in death.” (Pr 2:18; Isa 26:14) I'm hoping you this helps you find comfort in your lost as I have please feel free to ask any question you may have and I'll be more then happy to share with you what I know. Take care. In both the Hebrew and the Greek Scriptures, death is likened to sleep, a fitting comparison not only because of the unconscious condition of the dead but also because of the hope of an awakening through the resurrection. (Ps 13:3; Joh 11:11-14) The resurrected Jesus is spoken of as “the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep in death.”—1Co 15:20, 21


At 10:23pm on April 29, 2011, Vanessa H said…

Hi T,


No it was a good cry (smile) I was taken to a good spiritual place so it's definately all good.   Thank you for your offer to have an open ear and trust me I know I will be taking you up on that. At the same time I want this new found friendship to be reciprocated so I also want you to feel comfortable talking to me as well if the need be.


For me to come to this site I feel is a good and positive thing because it helps me sift through a number of emotions... I dont have a support system where I live (Bermuda) at all.  My mother was my only connection here and that is a part of why we were so close because we had each other.


I have family but they are all in the U.S.A. and unfortunately as it so often happens, everyone has basically scattered off and pretty much doing their own thing these days since the death of my grandmother over five years ago.  She was that one person that kept everybody connected. 


I have always been one of those people who had the attitude that some times you have to create your own family no matter where you are. That has not happend here due to the dynamics of this island. Lets just say people here are definately a different breed.


I would really like to think my mom is always here with me but since her passing I have not felt her presence. She is always on my mind but, I dont know. I sometimes wonder if I am looking for the typical sterotype of an image of her that people speak of or a vision. I have had dreams about her but I guess the important thing is she will always be in my heart and to some degree still very much alive through the presence of me.


I see that you have a sister and that is great that you have each other for support. Do you have any other siblingss

Here is my email nabotg@yahoo.com and in closing, you have helped someone today so your deed has been done.  Take Care

At 10:12pm on April 28, 2011, Vanessa H said…

Tamarah.....  All I can say at this moment is that when I read you response all I could do was cry... I'm reading your post on my page and all I can feel is such a strong positive energy.. Thank you so much for all your kind words and your prays...  I am glad to be able to connect with someone who understand what it's like to be so close to a mother and have that bond severed by the thing called death that is so permanent.  I have two children ( twins ) and my mom was able to meet them and spend a short time with them but I look at them everyday and wish she was around to see them now that they are getting older and really developing their little personalities... Yes I know exactly what you mean by the little things that happen and wanting advice whe you need it most.... There will indeed always be that ache of not having them around but I really believe that a higher power puts us in peoples lives and their presence for a reason.. I am glad that we are crossing paths at this time... I will keep you in my thoughts and prays too T... Take care and please keep in touch...





At 1:13pm on April 25, 2011, Stewart said…

how nice it has been to hear from you, I do hope that you are keeping well and that you are doing ok, I am working a lot these days to keep my mind off things and when I do have time off I tend to think of her a lot I have got to say I do still think of her as in the fact that she is still here and that maybe tomorrow I will see her again. deep down I guess that I will never see her again but that is such a crock that I dont belive but will get on with life best I can .


ok me is off to check this and that. stewart.x

At 1:13pm on April 25, 2011, Stewart said…

how nice it has been to hear from you, I do hope that you are keeping well and that you are doing ok, I am working a lot these days to keep my mind off things and when I do have time off I tend to think of her a lot I have got to say I do still think of her as in the fact that she is still here and that maybe tomorrow I will see her again. deep down I guess that I will never see her again but that is such a crock that I dont belive but will get on with life best I can .


ok me is off to check this and that. stewart.x

At 11:28pm on April 21, 2011, Stewart said…

Thank you for your message tamarah, as I was reading your message it brought back to me that time that I had woke in a hot sweat with such panic and the realisation that my mum was to pass over it was the strangest thing ever as my mum was still here and all was well but sadly it was not to be a few days after that my mum passed away in her sleep. so there must have been a connection there some place telling me that I had to reach out to mum, but still to this day I think if only I could have done something to prevent this as I knew before hand but never said it to my mum as it might have frigtened her. but sure enough when my mum did pass I just new even before I got the call to say that she passed early in the morning .


I am Glad that the opperation has gone well with you and you are feeling mutch better it is realy nice to chat with one that does share the same feelings as I do about my mum as you do about your mom.

thank you again take care stewart.

At 2:31pm on April 20, 2011, Stewart said…

hello tamarah,

thank you for your thoughtfull message today. as you said about  your mom, I am also the youngest in my family and do indeed miss my mum very much, it has just been over a year now and I do miss those days when I can just make my mums face light up with a card or a gift or better me. but those days have passed now and I do feel lost in the sence that I have no one to go to as my dad passed a few years before it was a emotional time and my dad's passing did hit me hard, but I am still trying to come to terms with the loss of mu mum as I have been so used to going to her and doing those little things that she would need doing, I feel kind of in a limbo state of were do I go if I need her but she is no longer there, So I just think of her a lot and play music that remindes me of the times we had together.I hope that eveerything is going well for you and that the opperation is not to difficult for you  to cope with. take care deepest wishes for the future stewart.

At 8:32am on January 28, 2010, Tamarah1271 said…
Mommy, I love you more each day. I miss you terribly. I need you but GOD wanted you ... Rest peacefully my "Ladybug" in HIS presence.

always your baby girl...
At 2:26pm on January 22, 2010, Terry H. said…
Thank you for your comments - I am here for you if you ever need to talk - Have a blessed day!
At 11:39pm on January 21, 2010, Maria said…
Thank you again for you kind and reassuring words. They really help. It’s nice to find a place and someone who finally gets it, who understands how truly difficult the experience. I wish I would have found this site a long time ago. Just talking to you and reading everyone experience helps me feel a little "normal". It’s not wrong to hold on, you don’t have to rush it and you’re not alone. The last part is the best. Thank you for being here for me a total stranger.
At 8:40pm on January 20, 2010, Dee said…
I feel like someone finally gets me. My Mom died July 22, 2009 and I am have a very hard time I miss her so much! My life hasn't been the same since. She passed from complications of COPD. She was my girl.... my bff. I can definitely relate. My Mothers sister is now ill. I can't bring myself to call her. I guess I am not ready to deal with this. (My daughter and I were the main caregivers for 2 years). People just don't understand that to a certain extent you just want to be left alone. Not having to answer to the all too familiar question "How have you been doing"? They really don't want to know. They really don't want to hear your sad story. In their mind they feel as though you should have gotten over this by now( like you have a time limit or something). However I understand everyone deals with grief differently. How can I "get over this"? For me, my Mother and I shared 43 years together. Day end and day out. Or the comment "you know she is in a better place". Which in your heart you know is true, however it doesn't take away the pain. People go on with their lives when they are not directly affected but as for me I'm still stuck on the loss. It's so hard. I cry everyday. My husband and children try to understand me
At 10:24pm on January 19, 2010, Maria said…
Hello Tamarah I am Maria from "Hurt." Thank you for responding. I helps to know that I am not alone in my feelings. No one around me really understands they make it seem like its been long enough to be upset. There are days that I cant seem to feel anything but upset. A picture,song,movie,music video and even a stain in the rug reminds me of him and I start to ache a little bit each time. Thank you again and sorry for rambling on...
At 11:43am on January 19, 2010, Tamarah1271 said…
Thank you so much Linda,

My Mom is buried about 30-40 miles away from me. I have since bought a house in another part of the state.

When she first passed away she was about 20min away and I used to go everyday to see her (everyone thought I was going crazy) but I didn't care it was therapy for me and no one needed to understand but me. Now I go during holidays, b-days and anniv.

I used to find peace and solace when I was there and a closeness to her. I would sit at the hill top and just look at the view and talk with her. If the trees swayed or the wind whistled in my mind she was conversating back. It relaxed me.

The last time I went (a month or two ago) I just cried and I didn't feel that peace. I don't what was different. but something was. Maybe I need to go more often again instead of just special occassions.

I miss her so much and it hurts so bad. I never imagined anything causing me to feel this horrible inside. I thought I could find peace in people saying she's not suffering or she's in a better place. I know all of that but yet I still selfishly want her here in the flesh with me. I am not ready to let go and I can't move on. Not yet anyways.

Thanks for listening to me, now I don't feel so alone.
Hugs! Tamarah
At 10:11am on January 19, 2010, Billinda said…
You hang in there! I am so sorry for the loss of your Mom. I feel that you are much younger than I am, and that can also make it more difficult for you! It is so good that you can talk about all of this, and share the things you remember. That is definitely a beginning for you, but I know well how difficult it is! You are NOT the same person, and you won't ever be, and if others don't understand that, or look upon it as a negative, you don't need them in your recovery! They will only prolong your grief and distress. Is your Mom buried nearby you? My mom is about 15 miles away, and I visit her often, and find it most healing and times to which I look forward. Let me know if I can do anything for you. Hugs! Linda

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