Ron:
I can honestly say that I know how you feel. My sister was murdered by her husband on 3/20/09 and it has almost been a year since her tragic death. I wish I could say that it gets easier each day, but that is not true. For me, it seems to be getting more difficult as time goes by. Being able to communicate thru this website has helped a bit and I'm contemplating talking with a Medium. I wish I could offer you some wonderful advice on how to function, but all I can offer is communication. Feel free to send back a comment and I will do my best to respond. Hang in there!
Julie

I was drawn to write to you because I just got your posting in my e-mail box about your sister's painful death. As a man you may feel you should have been there to help but when someone is bent on taking another s life there is nothing you can do. Your pain will not easily go away however as you share the stories and the memories of how Rosie lived life and how very much she meant to you, may you find comfort...And, throughout this difficult time, may you also know the deep sympathy and concern that is felt for you. The Bible assures us: “God is near to those that are broken at heart; and those who are crushed in spirit he saves.” (Psalm 34:18) May you find comfort in Rosie's memories that are yours to cherish always.

You'll have those days. And it's okay, the best thing to do is get it out and not stuff it in.

Hi Ron,

I just got your posting in my e-mail box about your sister's awful passing and first of all, I am so very sorry for your pain, I've never been close to someone that has been murdered, although I was a counselor at Columbine High on 4/20/99 and saw many needless teen deaths to violence even prior to that.
But, I have lost family members suddenly, one just recently, 12/31/09 and the grief process is one of:
1) shock
2) denial
3) anger
4) acceptance

and with each person the grief cycle is different. The 4 stages can repeat themselves at any time.....triggers can bring the pain back. The best thing I can suggest for you is to contact a grief support group in your area (they are usually in the newspapers and are free to attend) and/or journal your thoughts. Writing is very therapeutic..whatever you feel, write it down, join a fitness group to physically work out your pain, cry when you feel like it, allow yourself to feel the anger, pain, missing her.
Don't keep it in and run from it with damaging, negative ways. Start a campaign on helping others through similar situations, take positive baby steps daily and you will have your days that you don't wanna even get out of bed, but that's okay and it's normal.
My main message to you is to get it out through positive ways and celebrate her life, the greatness about her and it gets easier in time.
God bless you and my prayers are with you!
Ruthie