daphne holtz
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  • south san francisco
  • United States
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dreamed before my son passed

Posted on February 3, 2010 at 12:30pm 4 Comments

I am new to the site: My son Jared and his friend alex were killed in a car accident aug 4, 2009. It has been six months.Please pray for us

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At 11:06am on June 19, 2012, Juliana said…


My face smiled when I saw you had a message for me. Yesterday -marked the seventh month since my son passed. Tears run down my cheeks every day - I miss him dearly as I know you miss Jared.  Andrel my son continues to amaze me every day- he has brought so many valuable people to my life.  I search every day for answers -to why why does this happen to good people. I knew somethng horrible was going to happen the night he was hit by the drunk driver. I believe that feeling was God warning me.  As I search for answers I believe God uses us to show people that he is real, that he is good and that he knows best.  I believe he choose us and everyone in this situation so that we can set an example. The most horrible nightmare has become a reality for us and yet we are still hanging in there (at times I have wished to end everything) we are functioning because we have God in our lives.  I believe that God chose to take my Andrel to Heaven because he was an Angel and Angels belong in Heaven....God did not answer my prayers the way I wanted them to be answered - but he answered them in the way he wanted them answered.  I know one day I will know exactly why God chose this path for Andrel, my family and I.

Please don't miss-understand me I miss Andrel more than anything and I would give anything to have him back - this nightmare has torn my family and I too pieces but I do have faith we will see him again and he is helping to prepare us (my family) to make it to Heaven.


Andrel Gaines Forever in my Heart!!!!

At 12:03am on January 25, 2012, Juliana said…


I hope you still visit this site - I read your blog you mentioned a message from the Holy Spirit, I would love to know this message. My son to was killed in a car accident 2months ago. I didnt have a dream but a horrible feeling in my stomach (words cannot describe) I knew I needed to get a hold of my son Andrel so when I reached him by cell phone I knew he would be okay but he wasnt 15 mins.  later the car he was a passenger was involved in an accident that ended his life.  I miss him more than anything if there is anyway I can talk to you by phone or email it would greatly be appreciated.......I miss my Andrel like you miss your Jared


Juliana... my email is purple1795020@yahoo.com

At 10:54pm on November 10, 2010, richard mom said…
Daphne, so very gald to hear from you.And so sorry I haven't gotten back with you before now.Seems every other moment is bittersweet.The seasons changeing,the way the wind blows or the way the sun shines.I lost my last grandparent she just couldn't bear Richard being there without her.I live with your pain I go over things so often.Wondering if he had gone to the left instead of the right would he still be here.I try to convince myself that if he had of stayed his life would of had him in another place .Not as close as we were then.Love Lynn
At 3:32pm on October 8, 2010, Melinda Ellen Guinn said…
I'm not angry at God. He saved Candace fromsuffering further (from what, I don't know), I would never question God. After I die, I'lll know the reasons. She came to me and said bye, I guess, she stood behind me and rubbed my arms. I've NEVER had an experience like that. I was shocked. I know it was Candace. I know she didn't mean to die and she wanted to raise her 3 small daughters, 2 and two were 8. Not twins, 11 months apart in age.
At 3:24pm on October 8, 2010, Melinda Ellen Guinn said…
Thank you Daphne, I'm numb, I don'y have anything to say.
At 7:35pm on October 3, 2010, richard mom said…
Daphne,so very surpised when I saw there was an e-mail from legacy and it was you.I am so sorry I have not found the time to write you.You keep mentioning court.Is it over wrongful death.And you should not feel bad for counting.It was the moment that changed our life forever,we had to find a way to live again.God is good but so many things are over whelming, so hard to realize there is no control.No matter what we try to make this life,no matter how hard we try.We really have no control in the blink of an eye it's gone.
At 12:55pm on July 19, 2010, Gloria Gregg said…
I am new to this site just found it this morning. I lost my Daughter on March 5, 2010 she was 37 years old it happened suddenly, she left a 14 year old son
for me to raise. It's been real hard trying to deal with
but I know with God I can get through it.
At 10:30pm on April 1, 2010, richard mom said…
Daphne,are you o.k. i see it's been a while since you had any changes on your comment wall.hoildays are hard.let me hear from you....love ya Lynn
At 11:17pm on February 28, 2010, richard mom said…
Daphne,thankful to hear from you.So gald to know you are pushing forward and I belivie Jared is gald you went to the party.It went better than you expected because,it was meant to be.Those that we are not sure of and causes us concern can prove to be just what we needed.Without takeing steps to find out we may miss just what we need.Mornings were terrible at frist for me,I couldn't bring my self to go to church,I couldn't keep from crying but I pushed and went after a couple of Sundays,I stiil cried some but I needed the strenght it gave me.My moms name is Margaret Knight,She not any worse or better.I feel she's giving up since Richard left and 5 months later my grandmother,her mother left us also,she has not been the same.The weather is better with every week,days are longer and warmer in the afternoons.Which with the season change it brings memories of what you would be doing.And all the good times you had.Getting older brings ends to so many things.My grandmother had 11 brother and sisters.We had huge famliy reunions at the lake .Now there is one left everyone has drifted apart.And even some of their children have left us.People don't have big families anymore.Family units don't mean the same thing any more.And it's so sad that future generations will never know the joy of haveing a family that is big enough to play a baseball game.I wanted to tell you about a web site to check into ,Daily Strenght for moms.I'm also a member there.I hear from moms every day.I think you would like it to.Take Care, Love Ya, Lynn
At 7:52pm on February 26, 2010, richard mom said…
DAPHNE,How are you sweet lady.Seems every one at my house has been sick these last two weeks ,except Shyla my 8 year old.And now my mother is in the hosiptal.I was checking my e-mails and saw Jared on the home page of loss of a child.Wanted to know how you are and that I think of you often.Let me hear from you and about you.When I frist got a pc I could not find any memorial sites I knew they existed but i couldn't locate any sites.I tried every thing to find them every combination of words that might pull one up,but nothing.And now every thing seems to lead me to another one .Did you get the e-mail about the song Save a place for me.Hope this finds you well.Love Lynn

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